Author: fasted86

Briefly.

I put the sexy in dyslexic!

Come on folks, don’t be shy. Call me out when justified. Last week I asked a trivia question without providing the answer. Either you’re not reading or you don’t care. Regardless, I’ve asked the question again below (#1) while actually providing the answer below. You’re welcome.

Trivia #1: Which is the oldest amateur hockey team in the US, starting in 1924? – Newburyport Clippers, Exeter Sextet, Amesbury Maples, Rhode Island Scarlets, Concord Crusaders
Trivia #2: Since 1950, the average bear market has taken about how many months to mark its low? – 6, 7, 9, 11, 12, 14
Trivia #3: What percent of high school athletes go on to play sports at Division 1 schools? – 4%, 7%, 9%, 10%, 12%, 16%
Trivia #4: In what year did the 4^th of July become a national holiday? – 1776, 1777, 1870, 1876, 1901, 1945

If I could stick my hand in my heart, I’d spill it all over the stage.

Article I’ll skip: Howard Stern chooses his potential presidential running mate

The Celtics got off to a terrible start this past season and went on to the NBA Finals. The Red Sox got off to a terrible start this season and are playing much better after posting their best-ever month of June. I’m just sayin’.

Why do you pay more when going through a highway toll based on how many axels the vehicle has. That makes no sense to me.

I’m pretty sure I comment on this every summer but so far there have been 8 incidents in the U.S. where children have died after being left in vehicles in the heat for extensive time. Recently a father shot himself after realizing he left his 18-month-old in his car. So terrible.

Don Blair, athletic director at local Northern Essex Community College (literally less than a mile from me), received the National Association of Collegiate Directors of Athletics Cushman and Wakefield Athletic Director of the Year Award at their annual convention in Las Vegas. What an honor!

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: A bust of President Abraham Lincoln and a plaque of the Gettysburg Address have been removed from a Cornell University library because “someone complained.”

I’m in big trouble if people find out I don’t really have Tourette’s.

The Colorado Avalanche won the Stanley Cup. And that’s all I’ve got to say about that.

Worried about the stock market as of late? The average bear market takes about 19 months to get back all of its losses, but shallower bears—those when the S&P 500 falls less than 25%— bounce back faster. Stocks have recently recovered much more quickly, at only four and five months to recover losses from the last three bear markets.

Trivia #1 answer: Which is the oldest amateur hockey team in the US, starting in 1924? – Newburyport Clippers, Exeter Sextet, Amesbury Maples, Rhode Island Scarlets, Concord Crusaders – The Amesbury Maples (For you locals, kudos to the late/great Uncle Billy O’Brien, who played for the Maples)
Trivia #2 answer: Since 1950, the average bear market has taken about how many months to mark its low? – 6, 7, 9, 11, 12, 14 – 11 months
Trivia #3 answer: What percent of high school athletes go on to play sports at Division 1 schools? – 4%, 7%, 9%, 10%, 12%, 16% – 7 percent. (Kudos to my wife who was the captain of her college volleyball team!)
Trivia #4 answer: In what year did the 4^th of July become a national holiday? – 1776, 1777, 1870, 1876, 1901, 1945 – 1870

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Take Your Dog to Work Day!

And of course, Happy 4^th of July!

“Living in America
Eye to eye, station to station
Living in America
Hand to hand, across the nation
Living in America
Got to have a celebration”

– James Brown

Briefly.

Elvis Costello and Abba are touring together this summer but they haven’t figured out who the headliner will be. So, watch for Abba and Costello to find out who’s on first.

Trivia #1: Which is the oldest amateur hockey team in the US, starting in 1924? – Newburyport Clippers, Exeter Sextet, Amesbury Maples, Rhode Island Scarlets, Concord Crusaders
Trivia #2: What teams competed in the 2001 Super Bowl and who won?
Trivia #3: What team has lost the most Stanley Cup Finals series?

Trivia #4: Who is KaVontae Turpin?

The Red Sox have had their best winning percentage in the month of June in team history (16-4, .800)

I went to the liquor store the other day, shocking I know, and was given my receipt upon payment. Several comments on the receipt. First, it was about two feet long. Second, the bottom 2/3 pertained to the 6-step return policy. 6 steps to return an item?! Lastly, who in the history of mankind, has returned booze?

Tune in tonight as the Colorado Avalanche try to close out the Stanley Cup Finals against the Tampa Bay Lightning.

Article I’ll skip: THE WAIT IS OVER: Arch Manning reveals where he will play college football – OR – Tom Hanks shares why he loves crashing wedding photos

Shohei Ohtani excites me, well established. On Tuesday he hit two homeruns and had a career-high 8 RBI. The next night he struck out a career-high 13 batters. He retired 23 of the final 24 batters he faced. Stud!

Ohtani’s all-world teammate, Mike Trout, also just became the first player in MLB history to hit four game-winning homeruns in a single series. The Angels are 34-38 – DOH!

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: The PGA vs LIV. Rocking the world of golf as nothing before. I don’t blame anyone, I just think it sucks for the fans. Or does it???

They said it: “Golf is the only sport where you can destroy private property while intoxicated without getting arrested.” – ESPN College Basketball Analyst, Jay Bilas

So, Gronk is retiring again. DYK: While playing together as Patriots, during the regular season, vs the AFC, he and Tom Brady were 44-1. That’s crazy stupid.

I’ll tell you want I need. I need more cowbell!

In his first 403 games, Hall of Famer Vladimir Guerrero hit 87 homeruns. Through his first 403 games, his son Vlad Jr. hit 87 homeruns.

R.I.P. Tony “Goose” Siragusa (55) – Former defensive tackle for the Indianapolis Colts and Baltimore Ravens, where he won a Super Bowl in 2001. After his retirement from football, Siragusa became a sideline reporter for Fox Sports and appeared in the Sopranos.

Trivia #1 answer: Which is the oldest amateur hockey team in the US, starting in 1924? – Newburyport Clippers, Exeter Sextet, Amesbury Maples, Rhode Island Scarlets, Concord Crusaders
Trivia #2 answer: What teams competed in the 2001 Super Bowl and who won? – Baltimore defeated the NY Giants
Trivia #3 answer: What team has lost the most Stanley Cup Finals series? – The Boston Bruins (14)

Trivia #4 answer: Who is KaVo Tae Turpin? – The USFL’s New Jersey Generals’ season MVP wide receiver.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

We all have the power to change at least one thing a day… please make it your underwear

Happy National Take Your Dog to Work Day!

And a big Happy Birthday to my wife, Kathy! She’s the greatest!

“Is that you
Your eyes slowly fading?
Is that you
Your mind full of tears?
Is that you
Searching for a good time?
Is that you
Waitin’ for all these years?

And I hope you’re feelin’ better
Yes I hope you’re feelin’ good
Yes I hope you’re feelin’ better”

– Santana

Briefly.

I just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.

Trivia #1: What does “LIV” (the newly formed Saudi-backed golf league) stand for?
Trivia #2: The first U.S. Open (golf) was played when, how many holes and how many days?

It was Black Thursday in New England yesterday (Sox/Celtics). Oh well.

OK, one final time (until next season). I hate the NBA game. While I’m at it, I hate the “Euro Step/Move” and even hate the reference to it. (I know, a lot of hate there. Let me be)

What happens on the mile, stays on the mile.

Charles Schwartzel won the inaugural LIV Golf Invitational and took home a whopping $4.75 million!

My heart goes out to the residents of Odessa, TX who had either no water this past week or very low water pressure. As a result, a “boil water advisory” was put into place. Did I mention that the temperatures there were as high as 105 degrees in Odessa?

Sticking to the heat, a 67-old man was found dead in 123-degree heat in Death Valley. A note found on his car a couple miles away read “out of gas.” Sad

Article I’ll skip: Why ‘Bachelorette’ star left life in California for the Lone Star state. (can’t say I’ve ever watched that program)
Article I’ll skip, part deux: Ozzy Osbourne gives update on his health after ‘major’ surgery. (Now, if you know me, you know I am a big Ozzy/Black Sabbath fan. Still, I don’t need an update on Ozzy’s health)

In case you didn’t hear, Dodgers manager Dave Roberts was called out on a rule he didn’t know. You can’t bring a position player in to pitch unless your team is down by 5 or more runs. What? So, one of the greatest players of his time, Shohei Otani of the Angels, can’t be brought in to close out a critical 1-run playoff game? Silly rule. (Editor’s note: The Angels suck and likely won’t make the playoffs, but… you get my point)

Trivia #2 hint: You ain’t getting’ no stinkin’ hint!

The Giants, Yankees, Rangers, Knicks, Mets and Jets have gone 3,785 days, or 10 years/131 days without a championship. It is New York’s largest championship drought in the last 100 years.

Gas prices are so high I saw Sammy Haggar driving 55.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: Shelter Hope Pet Shop in Thousand Oaks, CA will not let you adopt a pet if you are a pro-gun supporter.
This week’s sign of the apocalypse, part deux: NYC cancels swim classes amid lifeguard shortage nationwide.

Headline of the week: 5 Teens Injured in Gunfire at Park After Anti-Gun Violence Rally

R.I.P. Shelby Scott (86) – Former WBZ-TV news anchor, Shelby was half of the nation’s first all-female anchor team with Gail Harris in 1977. She became legendary for storm coverage, prompting the Boston Globe to jokingly measure snowfall in “Shelbys” instead of feet.

How am I supposed to know how to act my age? I’ve never been this old before.

Trivia #1 answer: What does “LIV” (the newly formed Saudi-backed golf league) stand for? – It is the Roman numeral ‘54’ which is how many holes each golfer will play in LIV tournaments, as opposed to the standard 72 holes in PGA tournaments.
Trivia #2 answer: The first U.S. Open (golf) was played when, how many holes and how many days? – October 4, 1895, 36 holes played in one day.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Eat Your Vegetables Day!

“Go down, Miss Moses, there’s nothin’ you can say
It’s just old Luke and Luke’s waitin’ on the Judgment Day
“Well, Luke, my friend, what about young Anna Lee?”
He said, “Do me a favor, son, won’t you stay and keep Anna Lee company?”

Take a load off Fanny
Take a load for free
Take a load off Fanny
And (and, and) you put the load right on me
(You put the load right on me)”

– The Band

Briefly.

Don’t run with bagpipes. You could put an eye out or worse yet, get kilt.

Trivia #1: What is an informal term for when someone changes what one is saying during speech because one is not sure of what to say or because one is trying to avoid saying something?
Trivia #2: In the last 25 years, one NBA player has shot >= 60% from the field (>= 50 attempts) and >=60% from the three-point range (>=25 attempts) in a single season. Who is that player? Hint: He’s playing in the NBA Finals.
Trivia #3: The last place finisher of an LIV golf event wins a minimum of how much money? – Zero, $50, $1,000, $50,000, $120,000, $250,000, $500,000
Trivia #4: What is another name for the Root Beer Float (root beer and vanilla or chocolate ice cream?

Article I’ll skip: NBA commissioner Adam Silver says league lost ‘hundreds of millions’ of dollars after fallout with China. (My heart goes out…)

It’s June, 2022 and Pete Rose still is not in the MLB Hall of Fame and Warren Zevon still is not in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.

Speaking of which, Judas Priest in being inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame this year. Now don’t get me wrong, I like Judas Priest but over Warren Zevon? Please!

Quote for the week: “I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.” – Groucho Marx

Golf’s U.S. Open is really shaping up to be an interesting event. The likes of Dustin Johnson, Bryson DeChambeau, Sergio Garcia and several other golfers, who are jumping over to the LIV Saudi Arabia golf league, are being allowed to play. How awkward is that going to be out on the course?

A Texas woman gave birth to identical twin daughters this past March. What’s the big deal, you ask? Gabby was born on March 7 at 24 weeks and four days, while Bella was born on March 10 at 25 weeks. Hmmm.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: The University of Notre Dame Fighting Irish changed the lyrics of their fight song from “… while her loyal sons are marching onward to victory…” to “… while her loyal sons and daughters march on to victory…” Give me a break! Was there any discussion of changing the reference of “HER loyal sons and daughters” to “HIS loyal sons and daughters?”

Romeo Crennel has retired after nearly 50 years coaching in the NFL. As an assistant, his teams won 5 of the 6 Super Bowls (two with the Giants, three with the Patriots). In 2020 he was awarded the Paul “Dr. Z” Zimmerman Award for lifetime achievement as an assistant coach. His most recent title, in 2021, was Senior Advisor for Football Performance with the Texans.

In unrelated news, the Boston Bruins fired coach Bruce Cassidy after his teams posted the third most wins in the NHL over the course of his tenure.

The Phillies fired manager Joe Girardi. Apparently, he had been their manager for the past three seasons. Also, the Angels fired manager Joe Madden and, as of Thursday, are now 0 for their last 13. Ouch!

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: A 7-day weather forecast in New England

Can you even believe the Celtics can go up 3-1 with the win tonight?

DYK: The last time Jason Tatum, Jaylen Brown, Al Horford, Marcus Smart and Robert Williams III all played together and lost back-to-back games was January 5-6. The Celtics are 29-6 since January 8^th with those five in the lineup. Defense!

A couple of weeks ago it was an elephant that was being considered a human being. Now, a California court has ruled that a bumblebee is a fish, under California law. WTF is going on!

Trivia #1 answer: What is an informal term for when someone changes what one is saying during speech because one is not sure of what to say or because one is trying to avoid saying something? – Hemming and hawing
Trivia #2 answer: In the last 25 years, one NBA player has shot >= 60% from the field (>= 50 attempts) and >=60% from the three-point range (>=25 attempts) in a single season. Who is that player? Hint: He’s playing in the NBA Finals. – Jaylen Brown
Trivia #3 answer: The last place finisher of an LIV golf event wins a minimum of how much money? – Zero, $50, $1,000, $50,000, $120,000, $250,000, $500,000 – The last place finisher is guaranteed a minimum of $120,000.
Trivia #4 answer: What is another name for the Root Beer Float (root beer and vanilla or chocolate ice cream? – A Black Cow

The idea is to die young as late as possible.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Black Cow Day!

And Happy 26th Annual Charlie Penta Memorial Golf Day, as 324 golfers and countless volunteers and supporters spend the day remembering Charlie and enjoying golf, good food, awards ceremony and raffle, and of course comradery with friends young and old. All of this in honor of Charlie and in support of Haverhill High School Athletics. Here’s to Charlie! (Class of ’81, baby!)

“So you children of the world
Listen to what I say
If you want a better place to live in
Spread the word today
Show the world that love is still alive
You must be brave
Or you children of today are
Children of the Grave, yeah!”

– Black Sabbath

Briefly.

At this point, if I get picked up by aliens, I’m just gonna go ahead and consider it a rescue mission instead of an abduction.

Trivia #1: In the original “Top Gun” movie, Maverick and Goose are sent to Flight Weapons School (Top Gun) because the top pilot in their class quit. What was that pilot’s call sign?
Trivia #2: You likely have seen the black and white American flag flying somewhere in your travels. Some of the flags are nothing but black and white while others might have a single blue stripe in the middle, some have a single red stripe. What do those stripes represent?
Trivia #3: Who is Hanson Crockett Gregory?
Trivia #4: How many first-round draft picks are on the Celtics/Warriors playoff rosters, combined?

The Boston Celtics may not shoot like they did last night again in the Finals, but they did last night and ran away from Golden State. HUGE win on the road!

Damn, I do hate the NBA game. Yes, I said it again. How a coach teaches a young kid to kick it out to the three-point line from directly under the hoop is beyond me.

Article I’ll skip: Depp-Heard battle becomes social media trial of the century. (Hmmm, not here)

Atta boy: A 2018 Rutgers University graduate with a degree in psychology and biology, came out of school with $70,000 in student loans. Rather than sit around waiting/hoping for a government bailout, he started his own used book business and has since paid off all of his loans. My point? The goal of a college education is to learn something, work hard and become somebody. These kids took a risk by going to school and taking loans. Don’t bail them out because we feel bad for them.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: A woman who visited Walt Disney World Resort says she was “dress-coded” by theme park staff and was told to “leave or get a shirt.” (Editor’s note: While the shirt was somewhat revealing the Disney character ‘Ariel’ wears a seashell bra)

A close second to a sign of the apocalypse: PGA golfer Hideki Matsuyama was disqualified midway through yesterday’s opening round of the Memorial Tournament after painted lines were discovered on the face of his three wood. Hey, a rule is a rule, I guess.

Apparently, the new Saudi government sponsored golf league, LIV, is about to get under way. The league is paying Dustin Johnson about $125M to participate. Who doesn’t say “money talks?”

LA’s highest-paid ocean lifeguard raked in a total of $510,283 in total compensation last year, nearly half of which – $246,060 – was from overtime pay.

Speaking of salaries, NHL referees earn $27,000 per playoff round worked, regardless of the number of games. During the regular season, they earn $,4000-$5,000 per game.

Hitting the lottery, you’re doing it wrong: A North Carolina man, who won a $10 million lottery prize in 2017, will spend the rest of his life in prison after being convicted of first-degree murder of his former 23-year-old girlfriend.

Yesterday in MLB, the 2^nd Annual Lou Gehrig Day was observed. ALS, the rare and truly dreadful disease, affects about 5.2 people per 100,000 in the U.S. 

Quote for the week: “Good offense beats good defense any day of the week.” – Mark Jackson during last night’s NBA Finals Game 1. (What?)

Love, reign o’er me.

Trivia #1 answer: In the original “Top Gun” movie, Maverick and Goose are sent to Flight Weapons Training because the top pilot in their class quit. What was that pilot’s call sign? – Cougar
Trivia #2 answer: You likely have seen the black and white American flag flying somewhere in your travels. Some of the flags are nothing but black and white while others might have a single blue stripe in the middle, some have a single red stripe. What do those stripes represent? – Blue – in support of law enforcement; red – in support of firefighters. Not what you thought??
Trivia #3 answer: Who is Hanson Crockett Gregory? – The Maine mariner credited with inventing the donut.
Trivia #4 answer: How many first-round draft picks are on the Celtics/Warriors playoff rosters, combined? – 20 – Celtics (10), Warriors (10)

We never ran out of baby formula until men started getting pregnant.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Donut Day!

“Give me word,
Give me a sign.
Show me where to look,
Tell me what will I find?
What will I find?

Lay me on the ground,
Or fly me in the sky.
Show me where to look,
Tell me what will I find
What will I find?

Whoa, heaven let your light shine down
Whoa, heaven let your light shine down
Whoa, heaven let your light shine down
Whoa, heaven let your light shine down”

– Collective Soul

Briefly.

Beer… because you can’t drink bacon.

Trivia #1: Which of the following is slang for marijuana? – Mary Jane, Bobby Sue, Ella Mae, Rosie Dee, Dick Hurtz
Trivia #2: Of the four major professional sports, in the past 15 years in each league, Boston sports teams are in the top five in total playoff wins. Where does each of the four teams rank (1-5) in their sport?
Trivia #3: A group of penguins in the water is called a “raft.” A group of penguins on land is called what?
Trivia #4: Tomorrow, the Division III women’s lacrosse team from Gettysburg College will take on Middlebury in the semi-finals of the DIII tournament. What is Gettysburg’s nickname?
Trivia #5: The Red Sox’ Trevor Story has 32 RBI this month with 6 games to go. Who holds the Red Sox record with RBI in one month (41)?

The Celtics are really something. Tonight, they are 9-point favorites over the Heat in the Eastern Conference Finals and the Heat are the #1 seed. If Smart and Williams play, I don’t see any reason why they don’t win/cover. The Heat just look D-U-N.

Did you enjoy Tiger Wood’s collapse in the Open Championship last week, or did you feel bad for him and his injured leg? I can’t say I enjoyed it in any way, but I certainly didn’t feel bad for him.

Article I’ll skip: Colin Kaepernick impresses during workout with Raiders

Back to Tom Brady… Fox must be out of their collective minds signing Brady to a 10-year, $327M contract to commentate on NFL games when he retires. I don’t get it. Brady is far from articulate in his interviews. I really don’t think he is a fit for the job, but who am I? I’m not rooting for him to fail, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he sucks at it.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: All these shootings, I’m speechless. I’m really not speechless here but there isn’t enough space…)

This week, for the first time this season, each Red Sox regular starting outfielder is hitting .200 or better at the same time. Hard to believe.

Miami Heat starters combined for 18 points on Monday night.

In the past 60 years, the Red Sox’ Trevor Story is just the 6^th player in MLB, in a 5-game stretch, with 6 or more HRs and 17 or more RBI. Editor’s note: That was before last night – 1 HR and 4 RBI

Keeping on the Sox, over his past 22 games, JD Martinez is batting .446. That’s an awfully long stretch to be hitting at a clip like that. One would have to assume, in this day of babying athletes, that he is due for a day off. You know, to cool him down.

Quote for the week: “Man, I did love this game. I’d have played for food money… I used to love traveling on the trains from town to town. The hotels… brass spittoons in the lobbies, brass beds in the rooms. It was the crowd, rising to their feet when the ball was hit deep. Shoot, I’d play for nothing!” – Shoeless Joe Jackson (Ray Liotta) in the movie “Field of Dreams”

R.I.P. Ray Liotta (67) – Legendary actor known for his career-defining performance in the crime classic “Goodfellas” (Henry Hill), the critically acclaimed film “Field of Dreams” (Shoeless Joe Jackson) and many other film and television roles.

Trivia #1 answer: Which of the following is slang for marijuana? – Mary Jane, Bobby Sue, Ella Mae, Rosie Dee, Dick Hurtz – Mary Jane
Trivia #2 answer: Of the four major professional sports, in the past 15 years in each league, Boston sports teams are in the top five in total playoff wins. Where does each of the four teams rank (1-5) in their sport? – Patriots 1^st – (18), Celtics 1^st – (105), Red Sox 2^nd – (46) and Bruins 2^nd – (93)
Trivia #3 answer: A group of penguins in the water is called a “raft.” A group of penguins on land is called what? – A “waddle”
Trivia #4 answer: Tomorrow, the Division III women’s lacrosse team will take on Middlebury in the semi-finals of the DIII tournament. What is Gettysburg’s nickname? – The Bullets
Trivia #5: The Red Sox’ Trevor Story has 32 RBI this month with 5 to go. Who holds the Red Sox record with RBI in one month (41)? – Ted Williams

From monkey to human: 10 million years. From human to monkey: 10 beers

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Road Trip Day!

And, of course, Happy Memorial Day. Fly/Salute an American flag, thank a veteran, be grateful

“Well, I don’t know, but I’ve been told
You never slow down, you never grow old
I’m tired of screwin’ up, tired of going down
Tired of myself, tired of this town

Oh, my my, oh, hell yes
Honey, put on that party dress
Buy me a drink, sing me a song
Take me as I come ‘cause I can’t stay long

Last dance with Mary Jane, one more time to kill the pain
I feel summer creepin’ in and I’m tired of this town again

– Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

Briefly. (a relative term, indeed)

I don’t always carry all the groceries in one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

Trivia #1: DYK: There is a PGA stat called “Smash Factor?” – What does Smash Factor measure?
Trivia #2: Who threw the most recent no-hitter for the Red Sox?
Trivia #3: In 1970, Gino Cappelletti retired from the NFL as the league’s all-time leading scorer. Where does Gino fall now on that same list today? – Answer correct if within 5
Trivia #4: What former MLB player, now commentator, owns the Loma Brewery in Los Gatos, CA?
Trivia #5: How many years go by between the time the bottom ring of the Stanley Cup is filled with names and the top ring is removed?

The United States Air Force conducted the successful launch of a hypersonic weapon off the coast of California, which flew at five times the speed of sound. Brig. Gen. Heath Collins, Program Executive Officer for Weapons, celebrated the “major accomplishment” after a B-52H Stratofortress released an AGM-183A Air-launched Rapid Response Weapon (ARRW) at Edwards Air Force Base, in California, last Saturday. Cool!

Article I’ll skip: Amber Heard faces perjury claims in Australia COVID-19 dog incident

Trivia #2 hint: It was in 2008

In shocking news… the Red Sox Nick Pivetta through a 9-inning, complete game this past Wednesday night, only the 3^rd in the majors this season. Actually, when Pivetta got the first out in the 8^th inning, he was the first Red Sox starter to retire a batter in the 8^th inning this season!

Speaking of the Red Sox, well I was, the previous night Sox starter Nate Eovaldi through just 5 pitches in getting the Astros 1-2-3 in the 1^st inning. Speaking of the number 5, he then let up 5 homeruns in the 2^nd inning! DYK: One fan sitting in the monster seats caught two of those homeruns.

5 – The Sox’ Trevor Story scored 5 times last night!

When I’m tired and thinking cold, I hide in my music, forget the day…

Speaking of the Pirates, they beat the Reds last week 1-0 becoming just the sixth team since 1901 to win a game without a hit.

I ran out of gas the other day, called my insurance company and they totaled my truck!

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: Camillo Villegas is ranked 1^st in the PGA in smash factor.

Speaking of hockey, last Saturday and Sunday there were five(!) game 7’s. That’s pretty cool. The Bruins losing their game seven (3-2), that was not cool.

As for the Celtics, well they won their game seven last Sunday in crushing style (109-81). Now, not for nothing, but the Bucks’ Kris Middleton not playing in that series was comparable to Jim Rice not playing for the Sox in the 1975 playoffs. Just sayin’.

Now on to last night – B-L-O-W-O-U-T! Editor’s note: Another reason I don’t like the pro game. Scrub time. Now I understand, and have been there, scrub is nothing but throwing it up there with the hopes of getting in the box score. Nowadays, it’s a 3-point, brick tossing contest. Ugly and useless to watch.

The NBA, puh-lease. How does a guy like Marcus Smart not play one night, “sprained foot”, and then play as if he’s 100% the next game? Hockey players, they are not.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: 51-year-old Happy the elephant has lived at the Bronx Zoo for 45 years. Advocates at the Nonhuman Rights Project are arguing that Happy is an autonomous, cognitively complex elephant worthy of the right reserved in law for “a person.” That question, whether Happy can be considered a person, was before New York’s highest court this past week.

Let’s flip that around: “Not right now, honey. Today, I’m identifying as an elephant!”

R.I.P. Gino “The Duke” Cappelletti (89) – My bad for not mentioning this last Friday. Cappelletti spent 51 years with the Patriots franchise as an all-star player, assistant coach and broadcaster. A legend in these parts.

Trivia #1 answer: DYK: There is a PGA stat called “Smash Factor?” – What does Smash Factor measure? – Ball speed divided by club speed or… the amount of energy transferred from the club head to the golf ball.
Trivia #2 answer: Who threw the most recent no-hitter for the Red Sox? – John Lester
Trivia #3 answer: In 1970, Gino Cappelletti retired from the NFL as the league’s all-time leading scorer. Where does Gino fall now on that same list today? – Correct answer if within 5 – He is currently tied for 51^st with Dan Bailey
Trivia #4 answer: What former MLB player, now commentator, owns the Loma Brewery in Los Gatos, CA? –  The former “Greek God of Walks”, Kevin Youkalis
Trivia #5 answer: How many years go by between the time the bottom ring of the Stanley Cup is filled with names and the top ring is removed? – Every 13 years the top ring of the Stanley Cup (currently displaying championship teams from 1953-45 – 1964-65) is removed and retired to be displayed in the vault of the Hockey Hall of Fame.

Quote for the week: “The gratification comes in the doing, not in the results” – James Dean

From monkey to human: 10 million years. From human to monkey:  10 beers

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy Rescue Dog Day!

“When you can’t find the light
That guides you through a cloudy day
When the stars ain’t shining bright
You feel like you’ve lost your way
When the candle light of home
Burns so very far away
Well, you gotta let your soul shine
Just like my daddy used to say

He used to say soulshine
It’s better than sunshine
It’s better than moonshine
Damn sure better than rain
Hey now people, don’t mind
We all get this way sometime
Got to let your soul shine, shine till the break of day”

– The Allman Brothers Band

Briefly.

I used to sell security alarms door to door and I was really good at it. If no one was home, I would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.

Trivia #1: Where did Bob Lanier attend college? – Rutgers, St. Bonaventure, St. John’s, Grambling, Seton Hall, St. Louis, UMass Dartmouth
Trivia #2: What’s the difference between a groundhog and a woodchuck?

Trivia #3: The NFL started playing a 16 game schedule in what year?

Personal Record (PR) – it’s such a track ‘n field thing. He PR’d in the high jump. I PR’d in the mile. She PR’d in the long jump. If a guy hits a career high in homeruns, why don’t they say he PR’d? He had 47 assists last night which was a PR for him. Please! Hey buddy, you didn’t ‘PR’, you ran your best time.

They said it: “I don’t eat green eggs and ham, but if Al Horford is cookin’ it, I’m eatin’ it! – Celtics radio colorman Cedric “Cornbread” Maxwell while Horford was going off on Monday night.

Murder, you’re doing it wrong: A South Carolina man accused of strangling his girlfriend died of a heart attack while burying her in the yard.

Article I’ll skip: First image of black hole at center of the Milky Way released by astronomers.

More on the NFL schedule next week but… week 18 sees the Patriots traveling to Buffalo. Let’s hope that there are no playoff implications for the Pats riding on that game!

Bruins/Hurricanes game 7!

Speaking of the Bruins… the Celtics are in trouble tonight in Milwaukee. They are going to need Robert Williams and everything they’ve got. Do you believe?

You’ve got to bleed for the dancer.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: Christian Yelich, now tied with the most times in his career hitting for the cycle (3), has done so each time versus the Cincinnati Reds. If that isn’t useless information, look to trivia question #2.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: This is a bit of a stretch but work with me… Sonny Leon, the jockey who led Rich Strike to an improbably Kentucky Derby win as an 80-1 long shot, has been suspended for careless riding. The decision to sideline Leon stems from a late April race at an Ohio track when it was determined that the horse he was riding, One Glamorous Gal, intentionally interfered with another horse during the race.

R.I.P. Bob Lanier (73) – A Hall-of-Famer and eight-time all-star, Lanier played 14 seasons with the Detroit Pistons and Milwaukee Bucks and averaged 20.1 points and 10.1 rebounds for his career.

DYK: Bob Lanier was said to wear size 22 shoes, although that was disputed by a Converse representative, who told the Atlanta Constitution that Lanier wore size 18 ½. The ‘22’ was a Korean size.

Trivia #1 answer: Where did Bob Lanier attend college? – Rutgers, St. Bonaventure, St. John’s, Grambling, Seton Hall, St. Louis, UMass Dartmouth – Lanier led St. Bonaventure to the Final Four in 1970.
Trivia #2 answer: What’s the difference between a groundhog and a woodchuck? – There is no difference. The terms ‘woodchuck’ and ‘groundhog’ are interchangeable.

Ttrivia #3 answer: The NFL started playing a 16 game schedule in what year? – 1978

It feels good to walk into a store and buy whatever I want without looking at the prices. Shout out to Dollar Tree!

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Frog Jumping Day!

Ooo oooohhhh
Ooo oooohhhh
Come on and dance, come on and dance
Let’s make some romance
You know the night is fallin’
And the music’s callin’
And we’ve got to get down to Swingtown

We’ve been workin’ so hard
We’ve been workin’ so hard
Come on baby
Come on baby let’s dance
Come on, come on, come on
Come on, come on, come on
Come on, come on, come on

– The Steve Miller Band

Briefly. (gotta run)

Animal fact #26: Most bobcats are not named Bob.

Trivia #1: In 104 career playoff starts, how many times did Tuukka Rask let up 5 or more goals? – 2, 5, 9, 11, 19, 26
Trivia #2: Who holds the Red Sox team record with 5 different games with 3 or more homeruns?
Trivia #3: Who is Lucile Randon?
Trivia #4: How did the Rolling Stones come to get their name?
Trivia #5: Dusty Baker became just the 12^th MLB manager to win 2,000 games this past week. Which TWO of the following is not on that list? – Bobby Cox, Casey Stengel, Bobby Cox, Joe Torre, Jim Leyland, Bruce Bochy, Leo Durocher

I’m glad I don’t delve into politics but sometimes it’s a battle with myself.

It’s Friday and the Bruins are in trouble down two games to none to Carolina. Here’s hoping the change to Swayman in net can calm the storm. (see what I did there, storm… Hurricanes) Try to keep up.

Through the first two games of the series vs. Milwaukee, the Celtics have attempted 93 3-point shots and 71 2-point shots. Why I don’t like today’s game.

Speaking of not liking the game… yesterday the Sox’ Rich Hill was pulled after 68 pitches of 1-hit, 1-walk ball. 5 innings, no runs, 68 pitches!

Gross Red Sox stats: In innings 7-9 they have the 2^nd worst ERA in the AL and have scored their fewest runs thru 26 games since 1968.

They said it: “Larry Bird isn’t walking through that door.” – Rick Pitino. It was on this date, 1997, that the Celtics hired Pitino. He followed with a 102-146 record (.411) and zero playoff appearances.

Heckling, you’re doing it wrong. A 23-year-old, carrying a replica gun with a knife inside, jumped up on stage at the Hollywood Bowl and attacked comedian Dave Chappelle.

Locally, the Knights of Northern Essex Community College beat the Community College of Rhode Island 12-1 in the opening round of the Region 21 baseball tournament. It was the 29^th win in a row for the 35-2 Knights.

Article I’ll skip: Behavioral analyst confident she knows ‘aggressor’ in Heard-Depp relationship

I’ve got salad for dinner. Actually, a fruit salad. Well, mostly grapes. OK, all grapes, fermented grapes. Wine. I’ve got wine for dinner…

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: Of the current and former NFL players that Fox News Digital asked for what advice they had for incoming rookies on how they would gain respect in the locker room, Pacman Jones was one of them. Pacman Jones giving advice, really?
This week’s sign of the apocalypse, part deux: A Maryland county council meeting was interrupted by a man wearing a “poop emoji” costume. The man also broke a stink bomb on the meeting floor.

R.I.P. Naomi Judd (76) – Over their decades-long careers as mother-daughter duo The Judds, Naomi and 57-year-old Wynonna earned 14 chart-topping songs, earned five Grammys, nine CMA Awards and seven ACM Awards. Sadly, Naomi battled mental illness for much of her life and committed suicide.

Statistics show there is one opioid death in the U.S. every 5 minutes.

Trivia #1 answer: In 104 career playoff starts, how many times did Tuukka Rask let up 5 or more goals? – 2, 5, 9, 11, 19, 26 – 2 times
Trivia #2 answer: Who holds the Red Sox team record with 5 different games with 3 or more homeruns? – Mookie Betts
Trivia #3 answer: Who is Lucile Randon? – Lucile, otherwise known as Sister Andre’, is the world’s oldest living person (118) and has been a nun for 78 years. She lives in Toulon France, enjoys chocolate and has a glass of wine every day.
Trivia #4 answer: How did the Rolling Stones come to get their name? – They are named after the Muddy Waters’ song “Like a Rolling Stone”
Trivia #5: Dusty Baker became just the 12^th MLB manager to win 2,000 games this past week. Which TWO of the following is not on that list? – Bobby Cox, Casey Stengel, Bobby Cox, Joe Torre, Jim Leyland, Bruce Bochy, Leo Durocher – Casey Stengel (1,905) and Jim Leyland (1,769)

I was getting gas yesterday and noticed the person before me on pump 3 bought $10.00 worth. Where the hell was he going? To pump 4?!

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy Military Spouse Appreciation Day!

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers out there. (And to all you other muthas too!)

“I don’t want you to be no slave
I don’t want you to work all day
I don’t want you to be true
I just want to make love to you

I don’t want you to wash my clothes
I don’t want you to keep my home
I don’t want you your money too
I just want to make love to you

I just want to make love to you

– Muddy Waters

Briefly.

Not to brag, but I just went into another room and actually remembered why I went there. It was the bathroom, but still…

Trivia #1: Since 1920, what two pitchers have the record for consecutive quality starts (26), with a quality start being 6 of more innings and three or fewer runs. Hint, one was in 1967/1968, the other in 2018/2019.
Trivia #2: Which two of the following pitchers have NOT struck out a record 10 consecutive batters? – Tom Seaver, Bartolo Colon, Eric Gagne`, Aaron Nola, Randy Johnson, Corbin Burnes
Trivia #3: As of the 2021 NFL Draft, which college has produced the most drafts picks in NFL history? – Texas, Michigan, Notre Dame, Southern California, Florida State, Florida, Rutgers, UMass Lowell

Maybe it’s me but I don’t think it feels much like April 29! It feels more like February 88^th!

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: As of Wednesday night, the Red Sox were 4^th in the league in “hard” hit balls. Useless!

They said it: “When I say I’m here with Kev, I think that it really entails us managing this franchise together alongside [owner] Joe [Tsai] and [general manager] Sean [Marks], and just our group of family members that we have in our locker room, in our organization.” Kyrie Irving, self-appointed co-owner

Article I’ll skip: “Fauci makes bold declaration about the end of the pandemic in America”
Article I’ll skip, part deux: “A look at the celebs yet to testify in the Johnny Depp trial”

Still the man! Over the past 12 months, Warren Buffet’s Berkshire shares have returned 30% vs. the S&P’s 8%.

Relief! After 40 consecutive failed power play attempts, nearly an entire month, the Bruins scored two PP goals in the third period last night in their 5-0 over the Sabres.

Wow, what a venue created in Las Vegas for the NFL Draft which kicked off last night! Big party! Tough to believe it was the event’s first time in Sin City.

Three separate $1,000 bets have been made on the Utah State Aggies to win college football’s national championship. The payout is $1M.

Yankee fans, as always, are thugs.

Speaking of the draft, I do enjoy it but… “The Pick Is In.” Well, if the pick is in, please tell us who it is rather than waiting 4-7 minutes! I did time them and sometimes they went to a commercial break after “the Pick Is In” and it was up to 7 minutes before we heard who was chosen.

When Jayson Tatum, Jaylen Brown, Marcus Smart, Rob Williams and Al Horford all play and the Celtics score ≥ 100 points Celtics are (23-0, 1.000) in their last 23 games

Bring on the Bucks!

R.I.P. Guy Lafleur (70) – The first overall pick in the 1971 draft by the Montreal Canadiens, “The Flower” won 5 Stanley Cups while scoring 50 or more goals in 6 straight seasons.

Trivia #1 answer: Since 1920, what two pitchers have the record for consecutive quality starts (26), with a quality start being 6 of more innings and three or fewer runs. Hint, one was in 1967/1968, the other in 2018/2019. – Bob Gibson and Jacob deGrom
Trivia #2: Which two of the following pitchers have NOT struck out a record 10 consecutive batters? – Tom Seaver, Bartolo Colon, Eric Gagne`, Aaron Nola, Randy Johnson, Corbin Burnes – Bartolo Colon and Randy Johnson
Trivia #3: As of the 2021 NFL Draft, which college has produced the most drafts pick sin NFL history? – Texas, Michigan, Notre Dame, Southern California, Florida State, Florida, Rutgers, UMass Lowell – Notre Dame

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy Hairball Awareness Day!

Mumbling along to a song you don’t really know… but that 15 second part you do know is coming and you’re gonna own that!

“There’s colors on the street
Red, white and blue
People shufflin’ their feet
People sleeping in their shoes
But there’s a warning sign
on the road ahead
There’s a lot of people sayin’
we’d be better off dead
Don’t feel like Satan,
but I am to them
So I try to forget,
any way I can.

Keep on rockin’ in the free world,
Keep on rockin’ in the free world
Keep on rockin’ in the free world,
Keep on rockin’ in the free world.”

– Neil Young