Friday, August 26, 2022

Briefly.

Police officer at a guy’s front door: “I’m sorry sir, but it looks like your wife got hit by a truck.”
Guy: “I know, but she’s got a great personality.”
Police officer: “What?”

Trivia #1: What is the biggest union in America today, in terms of members (including inactive and lifetime members)? – Int’l Brotherhood of Teamsters, Service Employees International Union, Education Association of the U.S., United Auto Workers, International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers
Trivia #2: Who is Einar Gustafson?
Trivia #3: Which MLB pitcher is NOT in the top 10 for career strikeouts? – Steve Carlton, Phil Niekro, Bert Blyleven, Don Sutton, Greg Maddox

Go away, Tom Brady. (Hold on, Tom Brady! Yes. He doesn’t play for my team any longer and I don’t give a rat’s ass whether he is at camp in Tampa or on a beach in the Bahamas. Let’s just play some football already!)

Life really is like a box of chocolates.

The Patriots took a knee to end last Friday’s preseason game. It’s the preseason! Don’t you have at least some sort of play to work on rather than taking a freaking knee?!

Article I’ll skip: Sylvester Stallone is going through a divorce, but he’s a superhero in his new movie ‘Samaritan’.

Incredible stats, I think. J.D. Martinez, despite his long slump that has seen his batting average drop to .275, is still 2nd in the AL and 4th in all of baseball, in doubles. Even so, he is 5th on the Red Sox in RBIs.

Maybe it’s because I haven’t tried it but I doubt it. I like to do a lot of stuff when I drink, but throwing axes is not something I’m eager to try.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: ANY preseason NFL statistic.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: Youth basketball participants in Los Angeles are still being required to wear masks while they are on the court. (What is actually hysterical is that I read this and saw a picture of a game in progress supposedly proving this policy. The problem is, in the picture the kids’ faces are blurred for obvious reasons but you can’t see the masks either!)

Meanwhile, a boutique in Beverly Hills is banning customers from wearing masks, citing a recent wave of robberies wear employees were unable to identify thieves because they were masked. It’s madness, I tell you!

I’m somewhat of a traditionalist, don’t rock my boat. The Red Sox, as with every other MLB team, play ALL teams next season based on the new MLB schedule. I’m struggling with this however, the Sox do have a pretty cool road trip next May to San Dingo, LA (Angels) and Arizona. And the Dodgers are coming to Fenway in August, if you’re into that…

“I told you to put the seat down!!!” Udele Burno of Maryland has been charged with mowing down, and killing, her boyfriend with her car.

The WEEI/NESN Jimmy Fund Telethon was held this past Tuesday/Wednesday. I hope you caught some of it. The Jimmy Fund has been the official charity of the Boston Red Sox since 1953, making it the nation’s longest philanthropic partnership with a professional sports team. Back in 1948 it was then future Patriots’ owner Billy Sullivan who arranged a visit to “Jimmy” by star players from the Boston Braves.

DYK: 89 cents of every dollar donated benefits the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute’s lifesaving mission. In the grand scheme of things, that’s pretty good.

The nonpartisan Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget estimates that the student debt relief plan will cost taxpayers between $440B-$600B over 10 years. Just to be clear, there is no plan to eliminate student debt. There is a plan to transfer that debt to those who don’t owe it.

Quote for the week: “If you see what is right and fail to act on it, you lack courage.” – Confucius

Funny how the night moves, with autumn closing in.

Trivia #1 answer: What is the biggest union in America today, in terms of members (including inactive and lifetime members)? – Int’l Brotherhood of Teamsters, Service Employees International Union, Education Association of the U.S., United Auto Workers, International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers – The Education Association of the U.S.
Trivia #2 answer: Who is Einar Gustafson? – A cancer patient who, in 1948, had the “Jimmy Fund” named after him. The name ‘Jimmy’ was used to protect his identity. His identity was finally revealed in 1998.
Trivia #3 answer: Which MLB pitcher is NOT in the top 10 for career strikeouts? – Steve Carlton, Phil Niekro, Bert Blyleven, Don Sutton, Greg Maddox – Phil Niekro (#11 with 3,342 K’s)

I so good at forgetting shit I don’t even know where I was going with this.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Cherry Popsicle Day!

“I woke up in a Soho doorway
A policeman to my name
He said, ‘You can go sleep at home tonight
If you can get up and walk away.’

I staggered back to the underground
And the breeze blew back my hir
I remember throwing punches around
And preachin’ from my chair

Well, who are you?”

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