Friday, December 3, 2021

Briefly.

Hey, another few hundred thousand views per week and I can make some money with this blog! Don’t be afraid to “like” or share it with others.

I was in the liquor store yesterday and the clerk wished me a Merry Christmas as if she wasn’t going to see me 11 more times before then.

Trivia #1: Minnesota’s Justin Jefferson reached 2,000 career receiving yards a couple of weeks ago, in just his 24th game. He is the second-fastest player reach 2,000 receiving yards in the Super Bowl era, behind what receiver?
Trivia #2: Which of the following bands did NOT cover the song “Good Lovin’”? – Eddie Money, The Who, Captain Cardiac and The Coronaries, The Grateful Dead, The Raveonettes, Paul Revere and The Raiders. Bonus: What band sung the original?
Trivia #3: Who currently leads the NHL in points scored?

It is now OK for you to hang your Christmas decorations.

Good news/Bad news: In August, college basketball announcer Dick Vitale announced that he had had multiple surgeries for melanoma. Last month, Vitale announced that he has lymphoma (unrelated to the melanoma) and would undergo six months of chemotherapy. After several weeks away from the game, this past Tuesday night Vitale, emotional and in tears, returned to the broadcast booth for ESPN’s coverage of the Gonzaga and UCLA.

Speaking of Tuesday… (well, I was), this past Tuesday, November 30 marked the 50-year anniversary of the movie classic “Brian’s Song”. Starring James Caan and Billy Dee Williams, the film is often cited as one of the greatest television films ever made, as well as one of the greatest sports films. So I watched it the following night (cost me $3.95 or something) and I cried… again.

Thought for the week: Be remembered for how you lived, not how you died. – As George Halas said of Brian Piccolo at the end of the flick.

Patriots’ quarterback Mac Jones: Has the most wins by a rookie QB in Patriots history; Is the first rookie QB in NFL history, with >= 80% completion percentage in two straight games (minimum 20 attempts) against both Cleveland and Atlanta.

One more for Mac: He leads the NFL in most games with 65%+ completion percentage this season – 10 games. Trailing him with 8 such games are Tom Brady, Joe Burrow, Kirk Cousins, Kyler Murray, Dak Prescott. Not bad, rookie!

They Said It: “Oh, but I’m special!” – Gronk, looking as goofy as ever, in the USAA commercials.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: Now, I understand that all of the recently signed baseball contracts are absurd but… 37-year old Max Scherzer was signed by the Mets to a 3-year, $130M contract. Scherzer had back and shoulder issues his recent medical reports and missed time this past season with groin and biceps injuries. I’ll sure he’ll earn every penny!

Shohei Ohtani unanimously won the MLB AL MVP. He batted .257 with 46 homers and 100 RBI, and went 9-2 with a 3.18 ERA in 23 pitching starts with 156 strikeouts and 44 walks in 130 1/3 innings. Ruth-ian to say the least!

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: Shohei Otani’s exit velocity at the plate was 93.6 mph, sixth among qualified batters.

That’s it for baseball for a while. Sometimes you need a break from the bullshit.

I may have/did go down this path a few weeks ago but the Montreal Canadians have played 25 games this season. The New York Islanders have played 18.

Why doesn’t this happen to me?! 61 pubgoers/concertgoers were stranded in the Tan Hill Pub, the highest (elevation) pub in England, to see the band “Noasis”, an “Oasis” tribute band. Powerful storm “Arwen” unleashed destructive winds, dumped heavy snowfall and left three dead in its path. After three days trapped with the band the spectators jokingly renamed the band “Snowasis”. – Stuck in a pub for three days. I can hear it now; “But honey, they wouldn’t let me leave!”

Research published in the Journal of the American Medical Association showed that adult subjects followed for a decade who took at least 7,000 steps per day had approximately 50 to 70 percent lower risk of mortality. Just sayin’.

It’s “Jimmy V Week” again, 15th annual. Jim’s former wife, Pam Valvano Strasser, wrote recently of Jimmy and Dick Vitale and how great friends they were. The article ended: “The mission that Jim, Dick and the V Foundation set out for – victory over cancer – is still as important as ever. If you are able, please support cancer research by visiting V.org/donate.”

Sorry, but your password must contain at least 8 characters, an upper and lower case letter, a symbol or number, a hieroglyph, a haiku, a musical note, the feather of a hawk and a drop of unicorn blood.

R.I.P. Man, busy week for us locals, especially ones my age-ish. I’ll just send out a general “R.I.P.” to the several people I knew who recently passed away.

Trivia #1 answer: Minnesota’s Justin Jefferson reached 2,000 career receiving yards a couple of weeks ago, in just his 24th game. He is the second-fastest player reach 2,000 receiving yards in the Super Bowl era, behind what receiver? – Odell Beckham (21 games)
Trivia #2 answer: Which of the following band did NOT cover the song “Good Lovin’”? – Eddie Money, The Who, Captain Cardiac and The Coronaries, The Grateful Dead, The Raveonettes, Paul Revere and The Raiders. Bonus: What band sung the original? – The Raveonettes. Bonus: The song was written by Rudy Clark and first released in 1965 by “Lemme B. Good” (soon after made famous by The Rascals)
Trivia #3 answer: Who currently leads the NHL in points scored? – Leon Draisaiti of the Edmonton Oilers.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

“I was feeling so bad
I asked my family doctor just what I had
I said, “Doctor” (Doctor)
“Mr. M.D.” (Doctor)
“Now can you tell me what’s ailing me?” (Doctor)

He said, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah”
(Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Yes, indeed, all I, I really need

(Good love) Now gimme that good, good lovin’
(Good love) All I need is love
(Good love) Good lovin’, baby
(Good love)”

– Lemme B. Good

Friday, November 19, 2021

Briefly. (very)

Walmart is giving out free turkeys to anyone who can outrun security.

Trivia #1: Through 23 weeks, Justin Herbert of the LA Chargers had 56 touchdowns (combined passing and rushing), the third most by a quarterback in his first 25 games since the merger. What two quarterbacks are ahead of him?
Trivia #2: New Orleans RB Alvin Kamara is now tied for the most receptions (358) by a running back in his first five seasons in NFL history. Who is he tied with?
Trivia #3: Archie Comics’ “Hometown, U.S.A” and Riverdale High were inspired by what real life town and high school in the 1930’s?

After last season many said: “Well, I guess it was Tom Brady all along and not Belichick.” Well, how the tides have changed.

Speaking of the Patriots… is anyone more jealous of Matthew Stafford being traded to the Rams than Matty Ryan? I actually felt bad for him last night playing for that pathetic team/coach.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination:

They Said It: “…that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom — and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.” – Abraham Lincoln, November 19, 1863, in his Gettysburg Address

Life is uncertain, don’t sip!

I can’t bring myself to watch an NBA game.

Remember Benny Hill? If you don’t, google him and clips of his show.

I haven’t shared this public service message in a while but I have found that the best way to google something is on gooogle.com.

Good news: John Spencer Jr., an African American Vietnam War veteran, was awarded a Purple Heart, Infantryman Badge and the Republic of Vietnam Gallantry Badge after the UNC School of Law’s Military and Veterans Law Clinic fought to restore his veteran’s status after it was unfairly taken from him five decades ago, according to the UNC School of Law. He was given a less than honorable discharge after taking shrapnel to the neck and battling racism and discrimination from his own command.

Article I’ll skip: ‘MLB GM Meetings wrap up amid labor uncertainty’ AND ‘A Breakdown of Taylor Swift’s Dating History’

Blasphemy! The Fenway Sports Group looks to be buying the Pittsburgh Penguins.

R.I.P. Paul F. Moran Jr. (83) – formerly of Bradford/Haverhill MA, Paul earned his PGA card in 1962 and played on the tour with the likes of Arnold Palmer and Jack Nicklaus. He once held the “Triple Crown of New England” (holding three titles simultaneously) including the Massachusetts Open, the New England PGA Championship and the New England Open. Paul was my aunt’s brother.

Some of my friends exercise every day, meanwhile I’m watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell on the floor.

Trivia #1 answer: Through 23 weeks, Justin Herbert of the LA Chargers had 56 touchdowns (combined passing and rushing), the third most by a quarterback in his first 25 games since the merger. What two quarterbacks are ahead of him? – Deshaun Watson and Patrick Mahomes
Trivia #2 answer: New Orleans RB Alvin Kamara is now tied for the most receptions (358) by a running back in his first five seasons in NFL history. Who is second? – Roger Craig
Trivia #3 answer: Archie Comics’ “Hometown, U.S.A” and Riverdale High were inspired by what real life town and high school in the 1930’s? – Haverhill, MA and Haverhill High School

Good luck to the Winnacunnet Warriors in tomorrow’s NH DI Football Championship!

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

“Sugar, ah honey, honey
You are my candy girl
And you’ve got me wanting you
Honey, ah sugar sugar
You are my candy girl
And you’ve got me wanting you”

– The Archies

Friday, November 12, 2021

Briefly.

Fitness instructor: Have you ever done a marathon? Me: You mean on Netflix?

Trivia #1: What NFL team has the longest active winning streak? Bonus: How long is the streak?
Trivia #2: Led Zeppelin’s first four albums were titled Led Zeppelin I thru IV. What was their next album titled?
Trivia #3: What team has the best winning percentage on Monday Night Football?
Trivia #4: What three rookie quarterbacks, since the NFL merger, have five-plus wins, 10-plus passing touchdowns and 2,000-plus passing yards in their first nine career games?

A belated (Veterans’ Day yesterday) thanks to our veterans. DYK: One percent of our population serves in our armed forces. If we cannot give our best to this one percent, who are we?

I am embarrassed and did not mean any disrespect last week while not acknowledging the death of Jerry Remy. See below.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination:

They Said It: “Back in April, I praised Aaron Rodgers’s guest hosting stint on ‘Jeopardy!’ After watching him spew dangerous and debunked information about COVID-19 vaccines on ‘The Pat McAfee Show’, I’m grateful he didn’t get the full-time gig. The only show he should host is one in which the answers can be anything you want them to be, facts be damned.” – Chad Finn, boston.com
They Said It, part deux: “Cancer is a horrific disease, one that is all too prevalent these days. If you must endure something so grueling, there is no greater strength to help you though than that of Red Sox Nation. Dedicated and loyal to the end.” – Jerry Remy

The Patriots’ J.C. Jackson has as many or more interceptions than 8 NFL teams since the start of the 2020 season.

There’s plenty of room at the Hotel California.

Article I’ll skip: Paris Hilton marries… (what/whom ever)

Gonzaga is the consensus #1 men’s college basketball team heading into the coming season.

Good news: Eleven families adopted 15 children during a Halloween-themed legal proceeding in the Duval County Courthouse in Jacksonville, FL on October 29th. Unlike other adoption ceremonies that typically require a suit and tie and other forms of professional attire, costumes were allowed in court for the children.

You’ve likely seen the bumper sticker – ‘13.1’, right? Does that mean “Hey, I ran a half marathon!” or “Hey, I can’t run an entire marathon!”?

Believe it or not, I am looking forward to holiday movies on AMC.

Back to honoring veterans – Robert Patrick “Rocky” Bleier was nicknamed as an infant. He was a junior on the national championship Notre Dame football team in 1966, a captain his senior year and selected in the 16th round of the NFL/AFL draft by the Pittsburgh Steelers. After his rookie season he was drafted and volunteered for duty in South Vietnam and shipped out in May, 1969 assigned to Company C, 4th Battalion (Light), 31st Infantry, 196th Light Infantry Brigade. While on patrol in Hiep Duc, he was wounded in the left thigh by an enemy rifle bullet when his platoon was ambushed in a rice paddy. While he was down, he took shrapnel in his right leg and lost part of his right foot. As he recovered in Tokyo, told he would never play football again, he received a postcard from Steelers’ owner Art Rooney, “Rock, the team’s not doing well. We need you.” He went on to play 10 more years winning 4 Super Bowls. Thanks, Rocky!

Aaron Rodgers is a dink.

Article I’ll skip: Any article from here on in regarding Aaron Rodgers.

I miss Don Orsillo, but not sure he’d be the same without Jerry Remy. If you haven’t watched clips of past broadcasts with the pair, you have missed out. Do it now.

Triscuits are what I imagine the inside of a scarecrow tastes like.

You know, you can thank a veteran today too.

R.I.P. Jerry Remy (68) – The Remdawg, former Red Sox and longtime, beloved, Red Sox broadcaster, was in his 7th(!) battle with lung cancer since his initial diagnosis in 2008. He was once elected President of Red Sox Nation in 2007.

Trivia #1 answer: What NFL team has the longest active winning streak? Bonus: How long is the streak? – The Tennessee Titans (5)
Trivia #2 answer: Led Zeppelin’s first four albums were titled Led Zeppelin I thru IV. What was their next album titled? – Houses Of The Holy
Trivia #3 answer: What team has the best winning percentage on Monday Night Football? – The Seattle Seahawks (.718)
Trivia #4 answer: What three rookie quarterbacks, since the NFL merger, have five-plus wins, 10-plus passing touchdowns and 2,000-plus passing yards in their first nine career games? – Andrew Luck, Dak Prescott and Mac Jones

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

This past Monday was the 50th anniversary of the release of Zeppelin IV.

“Dance in the dark of night
Sing to the morning light
The apples turn to brown and black
The tyrant’s face is red

Oh war is the common cry
Pick up your swords and fly
The sky is filled with good and bad
That mortals never know

Oh, well, the night is long, the beads of time pass slow
Tired eyes on the sunrise, waiting for the eastern glow”

– Led Zeppelin

Friday, November 5, 2021

Briefly.

I might wake up early and go running. I also might wake up early and win the lottery. The odds are about the same.

Trivia #1: What is the nickname for University of Louisiana at Monroe (ULM)?
Trivia #2: What is the term for scoring 6 goals in a game of lacrosse?
Trivia #3: When Chargers’ quarterback Justin Herbert recorded his 11th career game with 300-plus yards passing, he tied what two players for the most such games in their first two NFL seasons?

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: “Search for life on other worlds tops astronomy to-do list”
Useless information supposed to fire my imagination, part deux: For the week leading into Halloween, Krispy Kreme temporarily changed its name to Krispy Skreme. Really.

The most useless play in professional sports? How about the NFL kickoff? Touchback after touchback. Useless. Let the receiving team just start first-and-ten from their 25-yard line. What about onside kicks, you say? OK, but the receiving team can’t recover inside of ten yards? Not just the kicking team, but both teams.

Article I’ll skip: ‘Jurassic World’ star’s post praising wife slammed by fans

Always entertaining, I think, when NFL Sunday falls on Halloween.

Good news: After 18 surgeries and a below-the-knee amputation, U.S. Army veteran Stephanie Vazquez was gifted a customized all-terrain wheelchair from Freedom Alliance, a national military support organization. The organization has been dedicated to helping veterans regain their mobility and independence with all-terrain wheelchairs for the last six years.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: Whitney Rose, a mom of two from Utah, reported that her 3-year-old son’s hearing aids appeared to have been “softened” (edited out) out of his school photo.

“No gas? No squidgy!”

Congratulations to the Atlanta Braves. I know but hey, at least Houston didn’t win!

Potatoes make French fries, chips and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying.

I know, I know, you don’t want to get the vaccine. Neither did Aaron Rodgers. How’d that work out?

Headline of the week: Iowa teacher’s body found under tarp at park, two students charged in killing. – Now, I didn’t like some of my teachers back in my day but…
Headline of the week, part deux: Airbnb reports $843M profit as revenue soars – as I type from my Airbnb this morning…

Back to baseball… I hate the “oven mitt” worn by some baserunners to help avoid injured fingers when sliding into a base. Back in the day… that kid/guy would be ridden all day (season) long.

Another great Chris Berman nickname: The Chuba Missle Crisis, named for Carolina running back Chuba Hubbard

I just need to see a few more campaign ads and then I think I’ll be ready to make my final decision. Said no one ever.

Trivia #1 answer: What is the nickname for University of Louisiana at Monroe (ULM)? – Warhawks
Trivia #2 answer: What is the term for scoring 6 goals in a game of lacrosse? – A “sock-trick”
Trivia #3 answer: When Chargers’ quarterback Justin Herbert recorded his 11th career game with 300-plus yards passing, he tied what two players for the most such games in their first two NFL seasons? – Patrick Mahomes and Dan Marino

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

“As we sat on the front porch of that old grey house where I was born and raised
Stared out at the dusty fields where daddy always worked hard every day
I think it kind of hurt him when I said “Daddy there’s a lot that I don’t know
But don’t you ever dream about a life where corn don’t grow”

– Waylon Jennings

Friday, October 29, 2021

Briefly.

How to eat candy corn: 1. Open bag; 2. Pour candy corn into trash can; 3. Eat a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup

Trivia #1: Damien Harris has 1,141 yards rushing through his first 236 carries, good for fifth n Patriots’ history. Which player is NOT in the top four? – Steve Grogan, Sam Cunningham, Dion Lewis, Larry Garron, Don Calhoun
Trivia #2: Since 1960, how many times has Congress raised the debt ceiling? – 11, 39, 61, 79, 91, 99, 118
Trivia #3: Bob Neumeier was the original voice of what NHL team?
Trivia #4: Rafael Devers has the most postseason RBIs (26) for a player younger than 25 years old. He is also tied for the most homeruns (8) in the same category, tied with what two players?

Last night’s NFL Thursday night matchup was pegged as a clash of the titans (7-0 Arizona vs. 6-1 Green Bay). It actually turned out that way as the Packers intercepted all-world Kyler Murray in the endzone with 12 seconds left to secure a 24-21 victory. (no, I wasn’t up for the ending)

The good news is the wildfire season is over in the western part of the U.S. The bad news? A train of storms along the Pacific Ocean, along with an atmospheric river of moisture, impacted areas of British Columbia, Canada to parts of southern California for multiple days. In Sacramento, for example, which went 212 straight days without measurable rain from March to mid-October, tallied 5.41 inches of rain on Monday topping the 24-hour record of 3.77 inches from 1962. Those 5.41 inches accounted for nearly 82% of the year’s total rainfall. The rain caused widespread flooding, debris flows, rockfalls and hazardous driving conditions. Some other numbers from the Pacific Northwest Bomb Cyclone – 159 mph wind gust at Mammoth Mountain, CA; 16.56” of rain in Middle Creek, CA; 42.0” of snow in Mount Rose, NV; 942 mb, the lowest barometric reading for the NW coast eva!

The weather here in the northeast ain’t been no picnic either lately!

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: The Patriots’ Pro Shop is offering a FREE team photo with all in-store purchases.

Article I’ll skip: Sitting Bull’s great-grandson confirmed through breakthrough DNA method

If I went through the hassle of dressing you up and hauling you around town to collect candy then yes, I am taking 30%.

Yes, it’s that time of year where AMC is playing Halloween-type movie after Halloween-type movie. You still have time…

Last Saturday started great for the UMASS Minutemen football team. They recovered the fumbled opening kickoff against Florida State and later kicked a field goal for a 3-0 lead. The rest of the game? Not so much. They then went on to lose 59-3.

The Celtics, through Monday, have taken 188 3-point attempts through 4 games, the second most through 4 games in NBA history.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: In week 2 of this NFL season, Las Vegas Raiders kicker Daniel Carlson kicker four field goals and made two extra points in the Raiders’ 26-17 victory over the Steelers. Carlson kicked so well that he lost to himself in fantasy football as his opponent had Carlson on his team.
This week’s sign of the apocalypse part deux: A supply chain issue kept Major League Baseball from getting enough World Series patches for jerseys sold in stores. Due to this problem, the league decided to keep patches off altogether.

Quote for the week: “A date with Gisele. A date with Gisele and I’m in.” – Tony Romo, during a broadcast, acting as the fan who had Tom Brady’s 600th touchdown ball as if he was negotiating with a Buccaneers official.
Quote for the week, part deux: “I’m sorry.” – Braves’ pitcher Charlie Morton, who took a 102 mph line drive to the lower leg in Game 1 of the World Series, threw 10 more pitches that same inning with one strike out and then returned to strike out Jose Altuve on 6 pitches the next inning before going down with what turned out to be a broken fibula. Meanwhile in the NBA, LeFraud James sat out the Lakers’ game that same night with “right ankle soreness”.

I just helped my neighbor bury a rolled-up carpet in the woods. Her boyfriend would have helped her but he’s out of town.

R.I.P. Bob Neumeier (70): “Neumy” was the original radio voice of the Hartford Whalers, went on to be sports anchor for WFSB-TV in Hartford, and then to Boston, where he became one of the most popular and respected sport media personalities in New England.
R.I.P. Paul Salata (94): Salata, after playing football at Southern California and in the NFL and Canadian Football League, created the Mr. Irrelevant Award that honors the last selection of the NFL draft.

DYK: Neumy, alongside ESPN-creator Bill Rasmussen, called the April 11, 1975 World Hockey Association playoff game “Brawl in the Mall” between the Hartford Whalers and the Minnesota Fighting Saints. The game resulted in a record 41 penalties totaling 217 minutes. The call became the B-side, opposite Brass Bonanza, on a record sold at the Whalers’ gift store and around town. (it is available on YouTube) – somewhere, Munnsy is smiling…

Trivia #1 answer: – Damien Harris has 1,141 yards rushing through his first 236 carries, good for fifth n Patriots’ history. Which player is NOT in the top four? – Steve Grogan, Sam Cunningham, Dion Lewis, Larry Garron, Don Calhoun – Sam Cunningham
Trivia #2 answer: Since 1960, how many times has Congress raised the debt ceiling? – 11, 39, 61, 79, 91, 99, 118 – 79 times
Trivia #3 answer: Bob Neumeier was the original voice of what NHL team? – The Hartford Whalers
Trivia #4: Rafael Devers has the most postseason RBIs (26) for a player younger than 25 years old. He is also tied for the most homeruns (8) in the same category, tied with what two players? – Mickey Mantle and Albert Pujols

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

“If you see something that looks like a star
And it’s shooting up out of the ground
And your head is spinning from a loud guitar
And you just can’t escape the sound
Don’t worry too much it will happen to you
We were children once, playing with toys
And the thing that you’re heairng is only the sound
Of the low spark of high-heeled boys”

– Traffic

Friday, October 22, 2021

Briefly.

I bought a head of lettuce from a small grocery store called Mommas and Papas. I can’t eat it because all the leaves are brown.

Trivia #1: How many phases does the moon have?
Trivia #2: Who was the first quarterback in the NFL to throw for 1,000 yards in a season? – Dan Marino, Arnold Herber, Johnny Unitas, Eli Manning, George Blanda
Trivia #3: Where is Bob Marley from? – Jamaica, Costa Rica, Cuba, Dominican Republic, Mexico, Lawrence

Only 13 teams have won an MLB playoff series by winning games 6 & 7. The Red Sox have done it twice (2004 and 1903). Hmmm

Speaking of the Red Sox… only 7 teams have lost back-to-back post season games by more than 7 runs. The Red Sox have now done that twice!

You might recall that last week I mentioned Wednesday, October 20 in New England? Well, it turned out to be Black Wednesday as the Red Sox, Celtics and Bruins all went down. (No, the NE Revolution’s win does not count)

I golfed last week and wore white shorts. My golfing partners were all over me for wearing white after Labor Day.

Article I’ll skip: Estranged wife of actor Robert De Niro will not get half of his acting income, court rules

Joe Buck is such a dick.

NFL Game of the Week may very well be the Detroit Lions vs. the LA Rams as both teams swapped quarterbacks in the offseason. Give me the Rams.

Cast your dreams before they slip away…

How is it that Astros’ manager Dusty Baker doesn’t choke on his toothpick?

The NHL is back in typical fashion. Six teams have played 5 games, the Bruins have played two.

The other night the Celtics’ Jason Tatum became just the 5th player in NBA history to take 15 or more three-point attempts while making only 2 or fewer of them.

Get ready! The price of regular unleaded gas at a station in Gorda, California hit $7.59 on Thursday as prices jumped across the country to a 7-year high.

Quote for the week: “Let your smile change the world but don’t let the world change your smile”

The Dallas Cowboys’ Ezekiel Elliot touched the ball 15 times in the first half last week vs. the Patriots. The Patriots touched the ball 14 times as a team in the first half.

See above. If you think for one second that any of my golfing partners noticed what color my shorts were then you don’t golf… or hang out with anyone.

I’m adopting a healthier lifestyle so I parked and walked inside to buy donuts instead of using the drive-thru.

Do you remember when everyone complained?? Golfer Casey Martin, who won a landmark court case to allow him to use a golf cart on the PGA tour, had his leg amputated. Martin is the head golf coach at the University of Oregon.

Trivia #1 answer: How many phases does the moon have? – 8 (First Quarter, Waxing Crescent, New Moon, Wanning Crescent, Last Quarter, Wanning Gibbous, Full Moon, Waxing Gibbous)
Trivia #2 answer: Trivia #2: Who was the first quarterback in the NFL to throw for 1,000 yards in a season? – Dan Marino, Arnold Herber, Johnny Unitas, Eli Manning, George Blanda – Arnold Herber (Packers in 1936)
Trivia #3 answer: Where is Bob Marley from? – Jamaica, Costa Rica, Cuba, Dominican Republic, Mexico, Lawrence – Jamaica (layup?)

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

“Preacherman, don’t tell me,
Heaven is under the earth.
I know you don’t know
What life is really worth.
It’s not all that glitters is gold;
‘Alf the story has never been told:
So now you see the light, eh!
Stand up for your rights. Come on!”

– Bob Marley

Friday, October 15, 2021

Briefly.

Wanna make a car dealer uncomfortable, just say “tell me if you can hear this,” then get in the trunk and start screaming.

Trivia #1: Which one NFL team is undefeated against the point spread so far this season?
Trivia #2: The Dodgers and Giants have been playing each other since 1890 (that’s what I read…). Before this season, how many times have they met in the postseason? – 0,1,4,5,7,10,14 time
Trivia #3: Which NFL team is in the midst of a streak of leading at halftime for 14 consecutive games, the longest in league history?
Trivia #4: How many points have the Patriots scored in the 1st quarter in their last 12 home games? – 0, 7, 10, 17, 24, 30, 37, 44, 60
Trivia #5: In this century, 29 teams have finished the regular season with 100 or more wins, only four went on to win the World Series. Which of the following did not – Chicago Cubs, Red Sox, SF Giants, yankees, Astros
Trivia #6 (Six?!?!): In what years did the Boston Bruins have four consecutive seasons with 50+ regular season wins?

Get ready Boston! All four sports will be in action soon! Wednesday, October 20 could see Sox/Rays (game 5), Celtics/Knicks, Bruins/Flyers. Buckle up!

The Bruins open at home tomorrow versus Dallas. They are currently +$1,400 to win the Cup. The Avalanche are the favorites at +$600.

The Celtics open Wednesday versus the Knicks. The Nets are favored to win it all at +$240. The Celtics come in at +$4,000.

You can’t say enough about the Red Sox! Beating the 100-win, heavily favored Rays three straight after dropping game one. The list goes on and on but Garrett Whitlock, who got the final three outs against the yankees in the Wildcard game, gets the win in the series clincher against the Rays. How sweeeet!

Speaking of the Dodgers… did you catch the end of game 5 last night versus the Giants? Neither did I but… the game ended on an appealed third strike swing and the 1st base umpire wrung-up Wilmer Flores for the final out. I watched it and didn’t think he swung. DOH!

Article I’ll skip: “Bill Gate’s daughter runs errands before lavish wedding” – whaaaa?!?!

There were 12 missed PAT’s last week in the NFL, tied for the most in a single week.

Why are the NFL’s Rams starting off so well? Matthew Stafford, traded from the Lions and notoriously one of the least mobile quarterbacks in the league, has been sacked an NFL-low 4 times so far this season.

Quote for the week: “When a stone hits a lake, it stops and then it sinks. So we literally hit the atmosphere and stopped, and it was about 5Gs…I’ve never experienced that. I was trying to smile but my jaw was pushed back in my head.” – Chris Boshuizen, a co-founder of satellite company Planet Labs, who flew alongside 90-year-old William Shatner in their Blue Origin flight to space.

Speaking of which, is there any truth to the rumor that, after seeing Captain Kirk’s backside upon his return from space, that he is now referred to as William Shatt?!

People often ask me (not once has anyone even considered) “Ed, what’s the status with the Fan Controlled Football League (FCF)?” – The FCF kicks off “soon” in 2022 with 4 new expansion teams and games will be available on Peacock as well as NBCLX (whatever that is). Talk about exciting!!! Hmmm
 
In useless news: ESPN has signed a five-year agreement with the NFL to broadcast the Monday night game during the first weekend of the playoffs, beginning this season.

In last Friday’s Red Sox 14-6 victory over Tampa, pitcher Matt Barnes warmed up in both the first and ninth innings. You don’t see that every day.

Urban Meyer. Sorry for him… NOT!

In WNBA news…

Sad news: According to the Pentagon, suicides in the U.S. Army’s active-duty forces jumped 46% last quarter compared to the same period last year.

Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding the other person is a complete idiot.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: The Rolling Stones have removed “Brown Sugar” from their performance playlist during their current U.S. tour.

JD Martinez rebounded from being as big a postseason disappointment as there could have been when he tripped over second base running out to right field in the Sox’ regular season finale. He missed the Wildcard game and game one vs. the Rays but rebounded nicely and is a big piece to this team. Let’s hope…

Trivia #1 answer: Which one NFL team is undefeated against the point spread so far this season? – The Dallas Cowboys who are a mere 4-point favorite over our New England Patriots on Sunday
Trivia #2 answer: The Dodgers and Giants have been playing each other since 1890 (that’s what I read…). Before this season, how many times have they met in the postseason? – 0,1,4,5,7,10,14 – zero!
Trivia #3 answer: Which NFL team is in the midst of a streak of leading at halftime for 14 consecutive games, the longest in league history? – The Buffalo Bills
Trivia #4 answer: How many points have the Patriots scored in the first quarter in their last 12 home games? – 0, 7, 10, 17, 24, 30, 37, 44, 60 – 10 points (they have been shut out 10 of 12 in the first quarter!)
Trivia #5 answer: In this century, 29 teams have finished the regular season with 100 or more wins, only four went on to win the World Series. Which of the following did not – Chicago Cubs, Red Sox, SF Giants, yankees, Astros – SF Giants (Cubs – 2016, Red Sox – 2018, yankees – 2009, Astros – 2017)
Trivia #6 answer: In what years did the Boston Bruins have four consecutive seasons with 50+ regular season wins? – 1970-1974 (57, 54, 51 ,52 respectively)

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

“In a place you only dream of
Where your soul is always free
Silver stages, golden curtains
Filled my head, plain as can be
As a rainbow grew around the sun
All the stars above who died came from
Somewhere beyond the scene you see
These lovely people played just for me”

– Outlaws

friday, october 8, 2021

Briefly. (Travel day)

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

Trivia #1: Who is nicknamed “La Pina?”
Trivia #2: What news station launched 25 years ago yesterday?
Trivia #3: How many players on this year’s ALDS Red Sox roster appeared in a game for the Red Sox in the 2018 ALDS?

Did you watch the LA Rams vs. the Seattle Shreks last night? I mean, what was with those uniforms?!

What a week for our Boston Red Sox. First, an incredible 9th-inning, come-from-behind win over the Washington Nats to earn the top AL Wild Card spot. Then, on Tuesday, a truly satisfying win over the Yankees in the one-game, Wild Card playoff. They did lose game 1 to the Rays last night in the ALDS but there is still baseball to be played, something we wondered about just a week ago.

Speaking of the Patriots… what was billed as “The Return”, Tom Brady’s return to Foxboro, pretty much lived up to its hype. I mean, good game (19-17) muchly thanks to the rain which had an obvious effect on several of Brady’s throws. He got the better of the Patriots, just not in grand style. As for Patriot’s quarterback Mac Jones, there is hope!

Good news: Michigan police officer Kevin Coates pulled over 79-year-old “David” for speeding. The man was distraught and explained that his son is mentally ill and his wife is in bad health. He had bought her a new television but was having trouble hooking it up. After letting David go with the warning, Coates and two other officers showed up at David’s house just hours later and help get the TV setup. Nice.

Speaking of football, what an interesting game this past Monday in LA. First, the Chargers had moved from San Diego to LA while the visiting Raiders had moved from LA to Las Vegas. Guess what? The Raider fans didn’t get the memo about the move and flooded SoFi Stadium such that it was like a home game for the visitors. Then, the game was delayed due to lightning. Did I mention that SoFi Stadium is a dome?!

Article I’ll skip: Arnold Schwarzenegger’s son Christopher unveils his weight loss during outing with mom Maria Shriver.

Quote for the week: “Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young.” – Henry Ford

I like the Baker Mayfield commercials. Note to the producers, keep including his wife in those commercials. What a hottie!

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: Jeffery Burnham of Maryland killed his pharmacist brother because he thought he was “poisoning” people by administering COVID-19 vaccines.

So, all you Jimmy G(aroppolo) fans, and you know who you are, here we go again. You pissed and moaned when the Patriots traded him and “only” got a second round pick in return. Garoppolo has now described his latest “injury” a calf contusion/sprain as a freak injury. Again, the guy just cannot stay on the field. Good trade.

Trivia #1 answer: Who is nicknamed “La Pina?” – The Houston Astros’ “Yulieski ‘Yuli’ Gurriel Castillo, who had a walkoff hit in Houston’s regular season finale, his only at-bat of the game, and he finished as the AL batting champ (.319). Gurriel is 37 years old.
Trivia #2 answer: What news station launched 25 years ago yesterday? – Fox News
Trivia #3: How many players on this year’s ALDS Red Sox roster appeared in a game for the Red Sox in the 2018 ALDS? – 8 – Chris Sale, Eduardo Rodriquez, Nate Eovaldi, Ryan Brasier, Xander Bogaerts, Rafi Devers, Christian Vasquez, J.D. Martinez

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

“Yes, I told you that light goes up and down.
Did you notice how the wheel goes ‘round?
And you better pick yourself up off the ground
Before they bring the curtain down.
Yes, before they bring the curtain down.”

– Cream

Friday, october 1, 2021

Briefly.

If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck and acts like a duck… according to Facebook fact checkers it’s a squirrel.

Trivia #1: Who was the best statistical running back in the NFL, in terms of yardage (10,434), in the 2010’s?
Trivia #2: Last weekend Matty Ryan led his 39th game-winning drive. Who did he tie as the active in leader in that category?
Trivia #3: The Baltimore Ravens’ Justin Tucker broke the NFL record last Sunday with a 66-yard field goal (can you say “doink!?”). Whose record did he break?
Trivia #4: The LA Rams’ DeSean Jackson caught his 9th career touchdown pass of 75 yards or more, tying an NFL record. Who is he tied with?
Trivia #5: The United States won the Ryder Cup by the largest margin in history (19-9). When was the last time the U.S. won back-to-back Ryder Cups?
Trivia #6: After three weeks, who are the only two undefeated teams in the NFL’s AFC?
Trivia #7: Who invented the word “Vomit?”

It’s October.

Are you ready, finally, for the Patriots (Bill Belichick) vs. Brady? Let’s get it on! If you say you are rooting for Brady AND the Patriots, that’s bullshit. Go Pats!

This just in, Gronk has 5 broken ribs and will not accompany the Bucs to Foxboro. That just sux! (hey, I read it on the internet!)

The only thing fair in life is a ball hit between first and third.

The kickoff (football). Without a doubt the most useless “play” in professional sports. The ‘protecting players’ argument is bull. Either push the kick back or drop it entirely and let the team start at the 25.  A waste of time.

River keeps on flowin’, never worried about where it’s goin’…

The Boston Red Sox. Shoot me! I take full responsibility for their debacle against the yankees last weekend. I just don’t understand…

Last night pitted the 2021 first overall pick in the NFL draft (Trevor Lawrence) vs. the 2020 first overall pick (Joe Burrow). It actually wasn’t a terrible game with the latter coming out on top. Man, few things pleasure me more than seeing Urban Meyer lose.

Not only is my short-term memory horrible, but so is my short-term memory.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: After kicking his record 66-yard field goal on Sunday, the makers of “Madden 22” boosted Jason Tucker’s rating to 99, for a limited time…
Useless information supposed to fire my imagination, part deux: Globally, McDonald’s sells 75 hamburgers per second

Chris Berman, love him or hate him? I love the guy, as old and corny as he can be.

Speaking of Trevor Lawrence, there are a lot of haters out there, calling him out because of his 7 picks in his first three career games. DYK: In Peyton Manning’s first three games he threw 8 interceptions!

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: A second hospital in Alaska is beginning to ration health care as the state deals with a spike in coronavirus cases.

Trivia #1 answer: Who was the best statistical running back in the NFL, in terms of yardage (10,434), in the 2010’s? – LeSean McCoy (who signed a one-day contract with Philadelphia to retire as an Eagle)
Trivia #2 answer: Last weekend Matty Ryan led his 39th game-winning drive. Who did he tie as the active in leader in that category? – Matthew Stafford
Trivia #3 answer: The Baltimore Ravens’ Justin Tucker broke the NFL record last Sunday with a 66-yard field goal (can you say “doink!?”). Whose record did he break? – Matt Prater (64)
Trivia #4 answer: The LA Rams’ DeSean Jackson caught his 9th career touchdown pass of 75 yards or more, tying an NFL record. Who is he tied with? – Lance Allworth
Trivia #5 answer: The United States won the Ryder Cup by the largest margin in history (19-9). When was the last time the U.S. won back-to-back Ryder Cups? – 1979-1983
Trivia #6 answer: After three weeks, who are the only two undefeated teams in the NFL’s AFC? – The Denver Broncos and the Las Vegas Raiders
Trivia #7 answer: Who invented the word “Vomit?” – William Shakespeare

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

I started a band called 999 Megabytes. Still haven’t gotten a gig.

“One two three four
If I had ever been here before
I would probably know just what to do
Don’t you?
If I had ever been here before on another time around the wheel
I would probably know just how to deal
With all of you
And I feel
Like I’ve been here before”

– Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

Friday, September 24, 2021

Briefly. (A little late today due to technical difficulties) Quickie today

I saw a bumper sticker yesterday that read “I’m a veterinarian, therefore I can drive like an animal.” Suddenly I realized how many proctologists are on the roads…

Trivia #1: Who was the youngest host of Saturday Night Live? – Miley Cyprus, Drew Barrymore, Macaulay Culkin, Justin Bieber
Trivia #2: Who has more regular season wins with the Red Sox – Terry Francona or Alex Cora?

\Won’t it be great to see the Red Sox eliminate the Yankees this weekend?

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: Red Balloon, a new job board offering postings from companies promising their employees will be “free to work” without the fear of losing their jobs due to medical dictates or political drama.

EZPass is probably the greatest automobile-related invention since the cup holder, but especially the tolls where you can cruise through at any speed!

I love the Rolling Stones but sometimes they contradict themselves. For example, first it’s “Time Is On My Side” and then it’s “Time Waits For No One” (and it won’t wait for me.)

Good news?? There is a report out there that a poison ivy vaccine is making progress.

So a catcher, while tagging a runner out at the plate, loses his card from his wristband that had all the strategy to the opponent’s batters out. The guy on deck picks up the card and goes to his bench. Fair or dirty move? This happened this past week during a Rays/Jays game. I say fair! You and your teammates should already know how to get yourselves out. Part of the game.

Crickets suck (the noise). Someday I hope this is my biggest problem.

Sign of the week: On a sign outside of Pica’s Pub & Grille in Methuen, MA – “Family Owned – Shut up… no, you shut up”

Quote for the week: “Wow. Another night with these shitty uniforms. WTF!” – Scott Zolak, on Twitter, regarding the Red Sox “LeBron” uniforms.

A truck loaded with thousands of copies of Roget’s Thesaurus crashed the other day losing its entire load. Witnesses were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupefied, confused, shocked, rattled, paralyzed, dazed, bewildered, mixed up, surprised, awed, dumbfounded, nonplussed, flabbergasted, astounded, amazed, confounded, astonished, overwhelmed, horrified, numbed, speechless and perplexed.

Trivia #1 answer: Who was the youngest host of Saturday Night Live? – Miley Cyprus, Drew Barrymore, Macaulay Culkin, Justin Bieber – Drew Barrymore (7 in 1982)
Trivia #2: Who has more regular season wins with the Red Sox – Terry Francona or Alex Cora? – Cora (280 and counting), Terry Francona (279)

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

So I was called out last week because I mentioned Todd Rundgren and Warren Zevon and then followed up with Billy Squire. OK, here you go.

“Hello it’s me
I’ve thought about us for a long, long time
Maybe I think too much but something’s wrong
There’s something here that doesn’t last too long
Maybe I shouldn’t think of you as mine”

– Todd Rundgren