Friday, November 4, 2022

Briefly.

Some of you should walk a mile in my shoes because then you would be a mile away from me and that would be fantastic. Keep the shoes.

Trivia #1: The first stadium built exclusively for football was built by which college? – Harvard, Fordham, Princeton, Notre Dame, Yale, Northern Essex
Trivia #2:  See below
Trivia #3: Who was Dr. Marthenia “Tina” Dupree?

Philadelphia couldn’t pull off the sweep last night as the Eagles remained undefeated with a win over Houston but the Phillies dropped game 5 of the World Series.

On this day: On November 4, 1980, pro-baseball’s all-time homerun king, Sadaharu Oh, retires. How many career homeruns did Oh hit? – 742, 799, 825, 850, 868, 898

Go away: EVERY politician on my phone, on my television, in my mail, etc. Please God, make it stop!
Go away, part deux: Kyrie Irving

Hey Josh McDaniels, I know your paycheck is bigger, but tell us. Is the grass greener?

And the meek shall inherit the earth.

Good news: Rhode Island man whose wife is battling cancer is trying to raise donations for medical research this Halloween by showcasing a whopping 1,000 hand-carved pumpkins outside his home. (hey, you got better news?)

According to TickPick, tickets for tomorrow’s Georgia/Tennessee game are going for $626 minimum which is the most expensive tickets on record for a college, regular season game.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: The National Association of School Resource Officers (NASRO), has tracked at least 60 instances of fake school shooting threats or hoaxes – sometimes referred to as “swatting” – across 30 states and Washington, D.C., since September.

Article I’ll skip: Diving into Hollywood’s dirtiest splits and their impact on star power

Beat down of the week. There was a prop bet on Wednesday night at over 19 ½, Philadelphia 76ers made three-pointers plus Philadelphia Phillies hits. The 76ers hit 19 three-pointers on the same night the Phillies were no-hit for just the second time in MLB World Series history. Ouch!

Speaking of MLB World Series no-hitters, here’s to former Red Sox catcher Christian Vasquez who had the pleasure of catching Wednesday night’s historically game. Good for him!

Get those Powerball tickets! (Didn’t I say that last week??)

And don’t forget to turn your clocks back. I’m turning mine back to June!

The Boston Bruins are 10-1, their best start ever to a regular season.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: WHO declares monkeypox still a global health emergency

R.I.P. Ray Guy (72) – The first punter ever taken in the first round (23rd by the Raiders), Ray Guy made the Pro Bowl his first 6 seasons and 7 in all. He played 1973-86, all with the Raiders, and was a member of all three Raiders Super Bowl Championship teams. Guy was drafted by four different major league baseball teams and once held the NCAA record with a 61-yard field goal. The award given to college’s best punter is named the Ray Guy Award.

Trivia #1 answer: The first stadium built exclusively for football was built by which college? – Harvard, Fordham, Princeton, Notre Dame, Yale, Northern Essex – Harvard
Trivia #2 answer: On November 4, 1980, pro-baseball’s all-time homerun king, Sadaharu Oh, retires. How many career homeruns did Oh hit? – 742, 799, 825, 850, 868, 898 – 868
Trivia #3 answer: Who was Dr. Marthenia “Tina” Dupree? –
For 12 years, Dr. Dupree worked for the second-largest chicken restaurant in the world as the Director of Community Relations and Training. She was widely known due to her work in the community. During this time and through her work with the community and the people she helped, Dr. Dupree became known as “The Chicken Lady.”

I recently saw an ad that read, “Radio for sale, $1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down…”

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Chicken Lady Day!

“We are the Priests, of the Temple of Syrinx
Our great computers fill the hallowed halls
We are the Priests, of the Temples of Syrinx
All the gifts of life are held within our walls”

– Rush (complete with Tom Hanks on drums. 😊 )

Friday, October 28,2022

Briefly.

I have learned two important lessons in my life. I don’t remember the first one, but the second one is to write everything down.

Trivia #1: Jonathan Swift’s “Gulliver’s Travels” was published in what year (by Benjamin Motte in London)? – 1694, 1726, 1798, 1815, 1845
Trivia #2: One Boston Celtic player currently wears a number not worn by any other player in the NBA. Who is it and what number does he wear?
Trivia #3: Which men’s college basketball team is NOT in the top 5 in terms of the number of alums currently playing in the NBA? – UCLA, Duke, UNC, Kansas, Kentucky, USC

On this day: On October 28, 1886, the first-ever confetti (ticker tape) parade was held in New York City celebrating the dedication of the Statue of Liberty by U.S. President Grover Cleveland.

5 days off between the end of the League Championship Series and the World Series. Jeez!

Yankees suck.

Go away: Kanye West. As Keith Richards once said; “Kanye West? Never heard of her.”

The Akers are 0-4. My heart goes out.

Get those Powerball tickets!

This year is the 50th anniversary of the Miami Dolphins perfect season. Currently, the Philadelphia Eagles are this season’s only undefeated team at 6-0.

Article I’ll skip: Climate activist glues his head to ‘Girl with a Pearl Earring’ painting in The Hague.

Headline of the week: A 54-year-old Indonesian grandmother who went missing last Friday while collecting rubber on a plantation near her home in Jambi was eventually found in the stomach of a 22-foot python after a two-day search. 

The Patriots’ rookie quarterback Bailey Zappe’s odds to win Rookie of the Year were 59-1 at the start of last Sunday’s game vs. Da Bears. By halftime, those odds were down to 5-1 and after the game they stood at 13-2.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: Tom Brady is below .500 (3-5) for the first time as a starter, 8 games into the season.

Me: When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?
My wife: I clean the toilet…
Me: How does that help?
My wife: I use your toothbrush
      

Brock Holt, Red Sox’ fan-favorite, has retired. Holt was a 2015 all-star and a 2018 World Series champ. As ‘Shoeless’ Joe Jackson said to Moonlight Graham, “Hey kid, you were good.”

Trivia #1 answer: Jonathan Swift’s “Gulliver’s Travels” was published in what year (by Benjamin Motte in London)? – 1694, 1726, 1798, 1815, 1845 – 1726
Trivia #2 answer: One Boston Celtic player currently wears a number not worn by any other player in the NBA. Who is it and what number does he wear? – Marcus Smart (36)
Trivia #3 answer: Which men’s college basketball team is NOT in the top 5 in terms of the number of alums currently playing in the NBA? – UCLA, Duke, UNC, Kansas, Kentucky, USC
– Kansas (10 players). For the record – Kentucky (27), Duke (25), UCLA (12), USC (11), UNC (11)

Candy is expensive! Don’t knock on my door saying “Trick or Treat.” You better say “Chicken of Beef” because I’m handing out Ramen Noodles

The greatest wealth is health.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Chocolate Day!

“He did the mash, he did the monster mash
The monster mash, it was a graveyard smash
He did the mash, it caught on in a flash
He did the mash, he did the monster mash”

Creepy!

Friday, October 21, 2022

Briefly.

No matter how good the hand soap smells, never walk out of the bathroom sniffing your fingers.

Trivia #1: Name the Red Sox player: At one time of another, he led the AL in OBP, OPS, runs, runs created, total bases, homeruns, extra-base hits, bases on balls, and times on base. He won eight Gold Gloves.
Trivia #2: Who is Lloyd Cushonberry III?
Trivia #3: Bailey Zappe posted a +100 rating on his first two NFL QB starts. Who are the other two rookies to accomplish the same feat since 1950? – Dan Marino, Andy, Dalton, Dak Prescott, Patrick Mahomes, Tom Brady, Jim Zorn, Eli Manning, John Elway

On this day: October 21, 1975, the Supreme Court rules teachers could spank their pupils after warning. (Had to throw this in as Haverhill, MA teachers ended their 4-day strike last night)

Draft picks, I just don’t get it. When Christian McCaffrey is healthy, and he has been this year, he is one of the most dynamic offensive players in the NFL. Last night the Carolina Panthers sent McCaffrey to the 49ers for their 2023 second, third and fourth-round draft picks, and their fifth-round pick in 2024. I say that is a steal for the 49ers who now have two of the most dynamic offensive players in the NFL with McCaffrey and Deebo Samuel.

On an annual basis, home sales in the U.S. plunged 23.8% in September.

I don’t like the Houston Astros and Alex Bregman in particular but… against the yankees? Go Houston!

Locally, this joke has been getting beat to death, but that’s for a reason. Henry Winkler is on a plane and the stewardess asked him: “Would you like some headphones?” Henry Winkler replied: “Sure!… but it’s pronounced ‘phaw-nz’”

Article I’ll skip: Choose your cheese, wine, coffee and chocolate carefully – they could give you headaches

Good News: The Celtics wore their commemorative uniforms on opening night to honor the late Bill Russel, one of numerous acts they are doing throughout the season for the former legend. They will wear those uniforms 11 times during the season to acknowledge Russel’s 11 NBA titles. Nice!

On Wednesday night, San Diego Padres catcher Austin Nola and Philadelphia Phillies pitcher Aaron Nola became the first ever brothers to face off against each other in the postseason. Parents A.J. and Stacie watched from the stands and showed as little emotion as they could muster. Good theater.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: A.J. and Stacie Nola sat in section 111, row 36.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: I like tuna fish and have begun to mix it with avocado mayonnaise. Avocado mayonnaise. There, I’ve admitted it.

Haverhill, MA borders Methuen, MA. On Tuesday night, Haverhill’s Noah Vonleh (Celtics) and Methuen’s Georges Niang (76ers) were on the court at the same time for an NBA regular season game. Small world (but I wouldn’t want to paint it…).

R.I.P. – Helen (64) – the oldest western lowland gorilla in the U.S. The Louisville Zoo had to make the difficult decision to euthanize Helen due to her declining health.

Trivia #1 answer: Name the Red Sox player: At one time of another, he led the AL in OBP, OPS, runs, runs created, total bases, homeruns, extra-base hits, bases on balls, and times on base. He won eight Gold Gloves. – Dwight “Dewey” Evans
Trivia #2 answer: Who is Lloyd Cushonberry III? An offensive lineman for the Denver Broncos
Trivia #3 answer: Bailey Zappe posted a +100 rating on his first two NFL QB starts. Who are the other two rookies to accomplish the same feat since 1950? – Dan Marino, Andy, Dalton, Dak Prescott, Patrick Mahomes, Tom Brady, Jim Zorn, Eli Manning, John Elway – Dan Marino and Andy Dalton

It will never be today again.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Reptile Awareness Day!

“Hey, girl, stop what you’re doing!
Hey, girl, you’ll drive me to ruin
I don’t know what it is that I like about you, but I like it a lot
Won’t you let me hold you, let me feel your loving touch

Communication breakdown
It’s always the same
I’m having a nervous breakdown
Drive me insane”

– Led Zeppelin – Communication Breakdown (and more on bonus Friday!)

Friday, October 14, 2022

Briefly.

Here’s to those who are seeing how long they can freeze before turning on the heat for the first time.

Trivia #1: Who was Andre Rene Roussimoff?
Trivia #2: Which of the following is not a number? One billion, trillion, quadrillion, quintrillion, sextillion, septillion, octillion, nonillion, decillion
Trivia #3: The Bruins’ Patrice Bergeron scored his 401st goal the other night in the Bruins’ opener. Bergeron is 4th in goals scored by a Bruin. Who is 3rd and who is 5th? Bonus for numbers of goals for each.
Trivia #4: Sticking with the Bruins, which player is not in the top 5, all-time, in Bruins’ penalty minutes? – Ray Bourque, Mike Milbury, Keith Crowder, Eddie Shore, Terry O’Reilly, Wayne Cashman

On this day: On October 14, 1908, upset over seating arrangements at the Baseball World Series, sports reporters form a professional group that will become the Baseball Writers Association of America.
On this day: On October 14, 1975, the Red Sox’ Carlton Fisk is interfered with by the Reds’ Ed Armbrister on a bunt in the bottom of the 10th inning but umpire Larry Barnett makes no call. The Sox would lose Game 3 of the World Series, 6-5.

Difficult to believe but true. Tuesday night’s walk-off homerun by Houston’s Yordan Alvarez was the first ever ninth inning, postseadon, two-out homerun by a player whose team was down by multiple runs.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: Alvarez’s homerun ranks first ever in MLB postseason history in “Win Probability Added” at +91.4 percent.

Yankees suck.

Have you been watching the NHL? During the first shift of power plays they show how long each player has been on the ice. Pretty cool, I think.

Leaves are falling all around, time I was on my way…

Article I’ll skip: Elon Musk jumps on new weight-loss trend; diabetic medications

The Bruins are undefeated. Just sayin’.

Angry wife’s note to husband: “Your dinner is in the recipe book on page 34 and the ingredients are at the store.”

They said it: “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” – Winston Churchill

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: New Zealand announced Tuesday a proposal to tax greenhouse gases farm animals produce, including burping and peeing, as part of its efforts to address climate change.

Trivia #1 answer: Who was Andre Rene Roussimoff? – Former professional wrestler, Andre the Giant
Trivia #2 answer: Which of the following is not a number? Billion, trillion, quadrillion, quintrillion, sextillion, septillion, octillion, nonillion, decillion – Sorry, they are all numbers
Trivia #3 answer: The Bruins’ Patrice Bergeron scored his 401st goal the other night in the Bruins’ opener. Bergeron is 4th in goals scored by a Bruin. Who is 3rd and who is 5th? Bonus for numbers of goals for each. – Rick Middleton is 3rd (402), Ray Bourque is 5th (395)
Trivia #4 answer: Sticking with the Bruins, which player is not in the top 5, all-time, in Bruins’ penalty minutes? – Ray Bourque, Mike Milbury, Keith Crowder, Eddie Shore, Terry O’Reilly, Wayne Cashman – Wayne Cashman (7th)

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Don’t bother walking in my shoes, that would be boring. Spend 30 seconds in my head, that’ll will freak you right out!

Happy National Be Bald and Be Free Day!

“Mississippi Queen, if you know what I mean
Mississippi Queen, she taught me everything
Way down around Vicksburg, around Louisiana way
Lived a Cajun lady, we called her Mississippi Queen
You know she was a dancer
She moved better on wine

While the rest of them dudes was a-gettin’ their kicks
Buddy, beg your pardon, I was getting mine”

– Mountain

Friday, October 7, 2022

Briefly. (Bear with me. Vacation ends next week)

Are you interested in time travel? Meet me here last Thursday at 7pm.

Trivia #1: Who won the 1998 championships in the NHL, NBA, MLB and the NFL (Super Bowl played in 1998)?

On this day: In 1916 Georgia Tech, coached by John Heisman, defeats Cumberland 222-0 in the most lopsided score in the history of college football.

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: Aaron Judge’s 62 homeruns traveled a total of 25, 520 feet.

DYK: Aaron Judge wears number 99 and hit his 62nd homerun on the night the Yankees record went to 99-62. Whoa!

Article I’ll skip: ALL articles on Tom Brady and Gisele. (Unless, of course, there are accompanying pictures of Gisele)

The Red Sox season is mercilessly over.

On that note, the Bruins play real games beginning next Wednesday, the Celtics on Tuesday, the 18th.

“You loot, we shoot.” – A sign in Punta Gorda after hurricane Ian.

I may have said this before but I predict a co-MLB MVPs with Aaron Judge and Shohei Ohtani.

Worst beatdown eva? Last weekend Syracuse was leading Wagner 59-0 at the half. Both teams agreed to play two 10-minute quarters for the second half, which voided all tickets on the game. DOH!

They said it: He should be revered for being the actual single-season homerun champ. That’s really who he is if he hits 62.” – Roger Maris on Aaron Judge

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: After Boston and London announced both respective marathons will feature a nonbinary division for runners who don’t identify as male or female, the Chicago Marathon will feature such a division this weekend.

Haverhill’s Noah Vonleh made his Celtics debut last Sunday in an exhibition game. His line was 13 minutes, 7 points (1-1 from 3-pt range), 9 rebounds and 5 fouls. Now that’s a full 13 minutes!

BElieve THEre is GOOD in the world. (see what I did there?)

Trivia #1 answer: Who won the 1998 championships in the NHL, NBA, MLB and the NFL (Super Bowl played in 1998)? – Detroit Red Wings (NHL), Chicago Bulls (NBA), New York Yankees (MLB), Denver Broncos (NFL)

If you put ketchup on your hotdog, we can’t be friends.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Best-friEND, boyfriEND, girlfriEND… it all “ENDs.” You know what doesn’t END? Garlic bread!

Happy National Chocolate Covered Pretzel Day!

“Stalemate, jailbate ladies can’t refuse
You love ‘em then you leave ‘em with your sold out reviews
No more, no more
Sweet-talkin’ barroom ladies disease
Slippin’ her lips slidin’ down your knees
No more, no more, no more
Baby I’m a screamer
Bound to a wife and marriage
Baby I’m a dreamer
Found my horse and carriage”

– Aerosmith

Friday, September 30, 2022

Briefly. (time to cook more bacon)

Two things that piss me off: People and running out of beer.

Trivia #1: How many times does Elton John say “Bennie” in the song ‘Bennie and the Jets’? – 24, 34, 44, 54, 64, 904
Trivia #2: After Albert Pujols (700), who are the next two in career homeruns for active players?

Ian! 10 confirmed dead, currently. My heart goes out. Flooding, loss of power (more than 2.5 million), devastation for so many. Georgia/Carolinas next. Good luck to all.

Pouring salt on the wound: Caskets at an Oakland, Florida, cemetery were exposed after heavy rain and flooding caused by Hurricane Ian.

On this day: Babe Ruth smacks his MLB record 60th homerun on September 30, 1927. – Aaron Judge hit his 61st 2 days ago.

I hope you are not on the side of Barry Bonds being the career leader in himeruns.

Article I’ll skip: George Clooney says he and his wife made a ‘terrible mistake’ by having their twins learn Italian.

Scary watching Tua Tagovioloa on the turf last night. It appears he will be OK.

There is a billboard on route 16S in Ossipee, NH that reads: “When you die, you will meet God.” OK, whatever. But that begs the question, what do you say/do when you meet God? Do you kneel and kiss his hand? Bow? What do you say? “It is a pleasure tom meet you, your Holiness?” “’Sup?” “Sorry about the time I snapped Julie Brown’s bra in the 6th grade.”

They said it: “I’m trying to think…” – Al Michaels. You don’t “try” to think. You either think or you don’t think.

T
his week’s sign of the apocalypse: The S&P 500 has lost about $9.1 trillion market value in 2022.

Trivia #1 answer: How many times does Elton John say “Bennie” in the song ‘Bennie and the Jets’? – 24, 34, 44, 54, 64, 904 – 44 times
Trivia #2 answer: After Albert Pujols (700), who are the next two in career homeruns for active players? – Miguel Cabrera (507) and Nelson Cruz (459)

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

I heard it in a love song. It can’t be wrong.

Happy National Love People Day! (and here I am saying they piss me off)

“I’m gonna buy me a ticket
As far as I can
Ain’t a-never comin’ back
Ride me a southbound
All the way to Georgia, now
Till the train, it run out of track

Can’t you see, oh, can’t you see
What that woman, Lord, she been doin’ to me
Can’t you see, can’t you see
What that woman, she been doin’ to me”

Friday, September 23, 2022

Briefly.

Beer, the reason I wake up every afternoon.

Trivia #1: What is the nickname of Emanuel College, Boston MA?
Trivia #2: Who is Andy Yosinoff?
Trivia #3: Zdeno Chara was drafted by the New York Islanders and spent four years with the team, then another for four years with what team before signing with the Boston Bruins in 2006?
Trivia #4: Which NHL defenseman is NOT in the top 5 in career games played? – Zdeno Chara, Ray Bourque, Larry Murphy, Nicklas Linstrom, Chris Chelios, Scott Stevens

Your everlasting summer, you can see it fading fast…

On this day: William Henry McCarty ‘Billy the Kid’ was arrested for the first time on September 23, 1875, after stealing a basket of laundry. (He escaped two days later)

The Bruins open their preseason schedule tomorrow night. Hockey, damn!

Cleaning the bathroom, you’re doing it wrong: An employee who provided housekeeping and cleaning services at Belk in the Columbiana Centre shopping mall reportedly found 63-year-old Bessie Durham dead inside the store’s family bathroom after 8 p.m. Monday. Surveillance cameras at the store allegedly showed the woman entering the bathroom area Thursday, four days prior to the discovery of her body, at approximately 7 a.m. She was never seen leaving the area.

Who looks younger, Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Joe Burrow (25) or Miami Dolphins coach Mike McDaniel (39)?

Article I’ll skip: NFL announces new Super Bowl halftime show sponsor AND… Will Harry and Meghan be given a second chance to join working royals?

Illegal snap infraction – it’s a thing!

I often find myself engrossed in the word of Doplar, the Greek(?) God of Weather. I follow his word and plan my days around him.

They said it: “And he said ‘Let there be rain’, and there was rain” (sometimes) – Doplar 3:16

In case you missed it, the New York Mets set a modern-day AL/NL record with its 106th hit batsman of the season. (The 1889 Orioles hold the overall record with 160 hit batsmen)

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: The United States Air Force Academy (USAFA) in Colorado is encouraging cadets to apply for a fellowship program for “gender minorities” that specifies “cisgender” men need not apply. “If you are a cisgender woman, a transgender woman, non-binary, agender, bigender, two-spirit, demigender, genderfluid, genderqueer, or another form of gender minority, this program is for you,” the application states. (holy shit, I don’t even know what half those references mean!)

Tuesday night I received a notification to watch all of Aaron Judge’s at-bats in that night’s game. Hey, what Aaron Judge is doing is incredible but watch his at-bats? I’d rather watch my nose hairs grow. (ewwww!)

Best commercial going: A Progressive Insurance commercial where the couple is preparing to go kayaking(?) and they realize they forgot the lifejackets. She blames him and he literally throws a red flag to challenge her charge. A referee comes in, they all put on headphones and the commercial ends with the woman saying: “My favorite part is when you say ‘I obviously won’t forget the lifejackets.’”

Trivia #1 answer: What is the nickname of Emanuel College, Boston MA? – The Saints
Trivia #2 answer: Who is Andy Yosinoff? – Andrew “Andy” Yosinoff is in his 46th season as the head coach of the Women’s Basketball Team at Emanuel College.
Yosinoff was named the 2022 Great Northeast Athletic Conference (GNAC) Women’s Basketball Coach of the Year after guiding the Saints to a 25-2 overall record including a 16-0 mark in GNAC action. He’s one of six active WBB coaches with 850 wins and the first D-III women’s coach to hit the mark. (Editor’s note: My wife’s niece, Kerry, is a captain for the Emanuel Women’s Volleyball Team, hence my interest)
Trivia #3 answer: Zdeno Chara was drafted by the New York Islanders and spent four years with the team, then another for four years with what team before signing with the Boston Bruins in 2006? – The Ottawa Senators
Trivia #4 answer: Which NHL defenseman is NOT in the top 5 in career games played? – Zdeno Chara (1680), Chris Chelios (1651), Scott Stevens (1635), Ray Bourque (1612), Larry Murphy (1615), Nicklas Linstrom (1564) – Nicklas Linstrom

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Great American Pot Pie Day!

After all these years my wife still thinks I’m sexy. Every time I walk by her she says, “What an ass!”

“Do you remember the
21st night of September?
Love was changing the minds of pretenders
While chasing the clouds away

Our hearts were ringing
In the key that our souls were singing
As we danced in the night
Remember how the stars stole the night away

Ba de ya – say do you remember
Ba de ya – dancing in September
Ba de ya – never a cloudy day

– Earth, Wind and Fire

Friday, September 16, 2022

Briefly. (very, I’ve got a tee time and I’m sharing a bathroom with 8 other guys)

You know you’re getting older when you clean to the music you used to drink to.

Trivia #1: Who won the 2006 championship in the NHL, NBA, MLB and the NFL (Super Bowl played in 2006)?
Trivia #2: Who is Marcus Freeman and what dubious “honor” does he have?
Trivia #3: Who hit the most homeruns in the 1970’s? – Willie Stargell, Reggie Jackson, Johnny Bench, Bobby Bonds, Lee May

And then one day you find, ten years have got behind you…

The scoring in tennis is stupid, period.

On this day: The Massachusetts village of Shawmut changes its name to Boston, September 16, 1630

The Buffalo Bills will beat the Minnesota Vikings in Super Bowl LVII (that’s the next one!)

In case you missed it, Mike Trout fell one game shy of the major league record for homeruns in consecutive games. His streak ended at 7.

Article I’ll skip: Harry is ‘terrified’ Meghan will leave him alone to attend funeral, says royal expert

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: The Ravens’ Lamar Jackson is representing himself in current contract negotiations. He just turned down over $200M over three years with $133M guaranteed!

Quote for the week: “Imagine bowing before this idiot just because of who gave birth to him? So strange.” – Gerry Callahan on King Charles

Trivia #1 answer: Who won the 2006 championship in the NHL, NBA, MLB and the NFL (Super Bowl played in 2006)? – NHL (Carolina Hurricanes), NBA (Miami Heat), MLB (St. Louis Cardinals), NFL (Pittsburgh Steelers)
Trivia #2 answer: Who is Marcus Freeman and what dubious “honor” does he have? – Freeman is the head football coach at Notre Dame and is the first ND football coach to lose his first three games. DOH!
Trivia #3: Who hit the most homeruns in the 1970’s? – Willie Stargell, Reggie Jackson, Johnny Bench, Bobby Bonds, Lee May – They are listed in order – Willie Stargell (296), Reggie Jackson (292), Johnny Bench (290), Bobby Bonds (280), Lee May (270)

We need to start worrying about what kind of world we are going to leave for Keith Richards.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Guacamole Day!

“She’s got a smile that it seems to me
Reminds me of childhood memories
Where everything was as fresh as the bright blue sky (sky)
Now and then when I see her face
She takes me away to that special place
And if I starred too long I’d probably break down and cry

Whoa-oh-oh! Sweet child o’ mine
Whoa, oh-oh-oh! Sweet love of mine”

– Guns N’ Roses

Friday, September 9, 2022

Briefly.

Procrastination is totally a good thing. You always have something to do tomorrow plus, you have nothing to do today!

Trivia #1: Who is the last American to win the U.S. Open singles title? – Andre Agassi, Andy Roddick, John Isner, Pete Sampras, Juan Carlos Ferrero
Trivia #2: Tom Brady is entering his 23rd NFL season, but he is short of the NFL record. What player holds that record and how many seasons did he play?
Trivia #3: What distinction do the following PGA golfers have in common? – Hale Irwin, Gary Player, David Graham, Bernhard Langer and Justin Rose
Trivia #4: What is the
pressure-sensitive, hot melt adhesive glue called that is used to stick credit cards to paper?

Let’s get together before we get much older.

In tennis news, the US Open is still going on…

Boy, did the defending Super Bowl Rams look terrible last night or did the Bills look formidable? I think a combination of both.

On this day: The United States of America was formally created by an act of the Second Continental Congress on September 9, 1776. 

More than a dozen states are debating whether to adopt California’s plan to ban new gas cars by the year 2035. Several of the 17 states are likely to move forward with the plan, including Washington, Massachusetts, New York, Oregon and Vermont. California’s restrictions are the strictest in the country, mandating that all new vehicles run on either electricity or hydrogen by 2035.

Ya, because California has the power. Not! Here they are today in crisis due to the excessive heat. Also, remind me again what we are going to do with all those lithium batteries…

Speaking of the CA heat, a series of wildfires are spreading throughout the state amid one of the worst heat waves in history. And here we were bitching a couple of weeks ago about a few hot days in a row.

Joshua Walker, a basketball coach from Louisiana, broke five world records in one day. Walker made the longest basketball shot (113’ 6”), the longest behind-the-back shot (48’), the farthest hook shot (80’), the farthest bounce shot (95’) and the farthest shot made backward (84’).

Good news: A burgeoning new field of forensic science called investigative genetic genealogy, which combines cutting-edge DNA analysis and traditional genealogy is being used to uncover decades-old secrets and crack the coldest of cases. The technology originally focusing on non-criminal human identification cases, such as helping adoptees find their biological families.

There was an article in the local paper on Wednesday with the headline ‘Merrimack Valley braves the rain at the polls.’ Help me out. What is “brave” about going outside in the rain?

Look at the offenses, namely the quarterbacks, in the AFC West. Raiders (Derek Carr), Chiefs (Patrick Mahomes), Chargers (Justin Herbert) and the Broncos (newly acquired Russell Wilson). There should be some points scored there!

Encore! – You’re doing it wrong. Canadian singer Weeknd abruptly stopped his sold-out SoFi Stadium concert in Inglewood on Saturday night just three songs into the set, telling fans he had to cancel the show after losing his voice in the middle of “Can’t Feel My Face.”

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: The Red Sox have 24 pitchers with at least one loss, the most in Red Sox history. (Useless, but astounding!)

I am a hopeless Red Sox fan.

Article I’ll skip: The real reason Meghan isn’t mourning in Scotland with the royals

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: A teacher at San Juan High School in California, identified as Danielle Serio, is known as “Flint.” Flint posted repeatedly on TikTok about books in the “queer library” and said it was available to students and has been active for five years. The “queer library” in her classroom was filled with over 100 books – some of which contained sex imagery, information on orgies, sex parties and BDSM. 

I hate the Yankees, news(?), and am not exactly a fan of Aaron Judge, but hitting more homeruns than any other Yankee in history is rather impressive.

Quote for the week: “why God gave us two arms.” – Dr. Ashish Jha, the White House’s COVID-19 coordinator, raised eyebrows on Tuesday for describing his recommendations for annual COVID boosters along with flu shots.

R.I.P. Queen Elizabeth II (96) – longest-reigning British monarch (1952-2022). So much to say but simply a legend.

Ya, I would have made for a great monarch when I was 25.

Trivia #1 answer: Who is the last American to win the U.S. Open singles title? – Andre Agassi, Andy Roddick, John Isner, Pete Sampras, Juan Carlos Ferrero – Andy Roddick (2003)
Trivia #2 answer: Tom Brady is entering his 23rd NFL season, but he is short of the NFL record. What player holds that record and how many seasons did he play? – George Blanda (26 seasons)
Trivia #3 answer: What distinction does the following PGA golfers have in common? – Hale Irwin, Gary Player, David Graham, Bernhard Langer and Justin Rose – They have all won official tournaments on all six continents on which golf is played.
Trivia #4 answer: What is the
pressure-sensitive, hot melt adhesive glue called that issued to stick credit cards to paper? – It is known as gummy, snot or booger glue. Really.

I made a huge ‘to do’ list for today. I just can’t figure out who’s going to do it.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy National Teddy Bear Day!

The Foo Fighters paid tribute to drummer Taylor Hawkins, who died back in March due to an apparent accidental overdose, with a concert at London’s Wembley Stadium last Saturday night. A star-studded event featured the likes of Paul McCartney, Rush, Queen’s Roger Taylor and Brian May, AC/DC singer Brian Johnson and the Pretender’s Chrissie Hynde. Hawkins’ son Shane played the drums in the band’s final tribute song ‘My Hero.’ Enjoy.

“Don’t the best of them bleed it out
While the rest of them peter out
Truth or consequence, say it aloud
Use that evidence, race it around

There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He’s ordinary”

– Foo Fighters

Friday, September 2, 2022

Briefly.

Hippos can run faster than humans on land and swim faster than humans in the water, which means the bicycle is your only chance of beating a hippo in a triathlon.

Trivia #1: Who has the most receiving yards in the NFL since 2016? – Davante Adams, Travis Kelce, Mike Evans, Deandre Hopkins, Julio Jones
Trivia #2: The Rams’ Cooper Kupp won the NFL Triple Crown last season for receivers (most catches, yards, touchdowns). Since 1967, only three others have accomplished that feat. Which three of the following? – Marvin Harrison, Jerry Rice, Steve Smith Sr., Terrell Owens, Sterling Sharpe, Anquan Boldin
Trivia #3: Which is not a legal political designation? – Democrat, New Alliance Party, Independent Third Party, Rainbow Coalition, Prohibition Party, World Citizens Party, Natural Law Party
Trivia #4: Bartolo Colon announced his retirement from professional baseball (he wants to pitch a couple of games in the Dominican Winter League) after playing 21 MLB seasons (1997-2018). Which MLB team did the big-headed one NOT play for? –
Indians, Expos, White Sox, Angels, Red Sox, Royals, Yankees, A’s, Mets, Braves, Twins, Rangers
Trivia #5: It is estimated that how many people across Asia, Europe and Africa were killed during World War II? – 1 million, 12 million, 24 million, 30 million, 41 million, 60 million

At this time next Friday, the NFL season will have started. Buckle up!

Go away (for good this time), Sarah Palin

On this day: On September 2, 1945, the Japs formerly signed documents of surrender ending World War II.

Congratulations to Rory McIlroy for winning the FedEx Cup.

Article I’ll skip: Manti Te’o spotted after catfishing doc goes viral, opens up about future

“Emergency COVID money”, don’t get me going.

“Warning”, you’re doing it wrong – An immediate evacuation notice from the Emergency Alert System that interrupted regular TV programming in the Los Angeles area Wednesday, telling the entirety of L.A. County and the “Eastern North Pacific Ocean” area to evacuate due to a fire was sent in “error” by Los Angeles County, the Ventura County Sheriff said.

If you haven’t seen it, look it up. A high school in Illinois did a “Mom’s Night” where the mothers suited up and got to tackle their sons. It’s great!

Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: Not really for this topic but I’m not sure where to include it… bear with me. A neighbor of Nikolas Cruz testified that the then 10-year-old went on a killing spree “…trying to kill every toad in the neighborhood…” during his penalty trial which will determine whether he is sentenced to death of life in prison. Full disclosure, I and others (no names of course), once killed countless toads once, ‘back in the day.’ None of us went on to massacre 17 people at the local high school.

I was in a discussion last night about which of the Williams sisters, Venus or Serena, would win in a fight. I don’t care how big/huge Serena is, give me the older sister. (There really was such a discussion)

This week’s sign of the apocalypse: The World Health Organization has invited the public to find a new name for monkeypox, calling for help in coming up with a less stigmatizing designation for the fast-spreading disease amid concerns about the name. Experts warn the name can be stigmatizing to the primates it was named after, but who play little role in its spread, and to the African continent that the animals are often associated with. (I did not make that up)

Quote for the week: “Welcome to College GameDay, week zero.” – ESPN’s Reece Davis one week before college football officially got under way.

Trivia #1 answer: Who has the most receiving yards in the NFL since 2016? – Davante Adams, Travis Kelce, Mike Evans, Deandre Hopkins, Julio Jones – Travis Kelce (7,269)
Trivia #2 answer: The Rams’ Cooper Kupp won the NFL Triple Crown last season for receivers (most catches, yards, touchdowns). Since 1967, only three others have accomplished that feat. Which three of the following? – Marvin Harrison, Jerry Rice, Steve Smith Sr., Terrell Owens, Sterling Sharpe, Anquan Boldin – Jerry Rice (1990), Sterling Sharpe (1992), Steve Smith Sr. (2005)
Trivia #3: Which is not a legal political designation? – Democrat, New Alliance Party, Independent Third Party, Rainbow Coalition, Prohibition Party, World Citizens Party, Natural Law Party – Kind of a trick question here as the answer is Independent Third Party. The actual name is Interdependent Third Party
Trivia #4 answer: Bartolo Colon announced his retirement from professional baseball (he wants to pitch a couple of games in the Dominican Winter League) after playing 21 MLB seasons (1997-2018). Which MLB team did the big-headed one NOT play for? –
Indians, Expos, White Sox, Angels, Red Sox, Royals, Yankees, A’s, Mets, Braves, Twins, Rangers – he did not play for the Royals
Trivia #5 answer: It is estimated that how many people across Asia, Europe and Africa were killed during World War II? – 1 million, 12 million, 24 million, 30 million, 41 million, 60 million – 60 million!

When I dunk my cookies, I think of you… and hold them under until the bubbles stop.

Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)

Happy World Coconut Day!

I have always tried not to repeat songs in this section however, with the addition of video, some are just worth repeating. Having said that, I have found that some tunes do not have proper video. I’m am opting out of those. I hope you enjoy.

“And if I say to you tomorrow
‘Take my hand, child, come with me
It’s to a castle I will take you
Where what’s to be, they say will be.’

Catch the wind
See us spin
Sail away
Leave today
Way up high in the sky

But the wind won’t blow
You really shouldn’t go
It only goes to show
That you will be mine
By taking our time”