Briefly. (I woke up handsome again. This is getting ridiculous)
Her, lying in bed next to her husband, thinking to herself: “I bet he is thinking of another woman.”
Him, thinking to himself: “I wonder how long it takes for a giraffe to throw up?”
Trivia #1: Three of the following MLB teams have never had a league MVP. Which three? – Tampa Bay Devil Rays, San Diego Padres, Florida Marlins, New York Mets, Arizona Diamondbacks, Kansas City Royals
Trivia #2: Of the top 9, total strikeouts in a 10-game span, there are only two pitchers on that list. Which two? – Nolan Ryan and Randy Johnson, Nolan Ryan and Steve Carlton, Roger Clemens and Pedro Martinez, Nolan Ryan and Justin Verlander, Bob Feller and Roger Clemens, Nolan Ryan and Pedro Martinez
Trivia #3: Who has the most Opening Day RBIs (21) in his career? – Adam Dunn, Miguel Cabrera, Vladimir Guerrero, Dave Kingman, Mo Vaughn, Ken Griffey Jr.
Trivia #4: Who has the most Opening Day strikeouts in his career (107) – Tom Seaver, Bob Gibson, Randy Johnson, Pedro Martinez, Roger Clemens, Ric Accardi
Yes, I know it’s not the “Devil” Rays any more. Jeez, you must be a Commanders or Guardians fan.
Stop complaining: See “Not-so-good news” below.
And this; Three wildfires in western North Carolina are proving challenging for firefighters to beat because of rough terrain and debris left behind by Hurricane Helene.
On this date: March 28, 1797, Nathaniel Briggs of New Hampshire patents the washing machine. (He was destined to become a popular lady’s man!)
March 28, 1885, US Salvation Army officially organized
March 28, 1957, 1st National Curling Championship held
March 28, 1972, Elvis Presley records his final Top Ten hit, a cover of “Burning Love”, a song written by Dennis Linde, and first recorded by Arthur Alexander
March 28, 2017, World’s largest dinosaur footprint at 1.7 metres found in Kimberley, Western Australia
Opening Day in MLB was yesterday! Your Boston Red Sox are 1-0 after a thrilling 5-2 win. They are tied for 1st place in the AL East and on pace to go 162-0.
Let’s summarize the Sox’ schedule, shall we?
– They open at home next Friday, April 4th vs the Cardinals
– Their dreaded west coast trip is in mid-June (SEA, SF, LAA). They opened the season on that trip last year
– Their longest homestand is 10 games in 10 days (ATL, Mets, BALT) towards the end of May. Their longest road trip is the aforementioned west coast swing
– They end with 3 home games vs Detroit
– They don’t play the Yankees until June 6th
– They play 10 divisional games in a row (2 at home), in late August (BAL (6) and Yankees (4))
This week’s sign of the apocalypse: A tranquilizer commonly referred to as a “zombie drug” is being manufactured and smuggled across the U.S. southern border. The drug xylazine, known as “tranq” in street lingo, is used as a tranquilizer by veterinarians. The drug leaves users in a “zombie-like” state as it constricts blood vessels and cuts off oxygen flow to the body, causing abscesses that rot the flesh.
They said it: “He’s not human!” – Ian Eagle on Duke’s Tyrese Proctor last weekend. Yes, the kid got hot and hit 7-8 from 3-point range. He got hot. Relax, Ian.
Stuntman!… you’re doing it wrong: Chachi Valencia, whose stage name is The Rocketman Valencia, was performing his death-defying human cannonball act at the Riverside County Fair and National Date Festival in Indio. Footage from the accident shows Valencia, a sixth-generation circus performer, sailing through the air after being launched from a 35-foot human cannon. As he falls to the landing spot, a gust of wind blows him toward the side of the net, causing him to bounce into the air and smash into the concrete ground below.
Good news: After an expected brief mission to the International Space Station, astronauts Butch Wilmore and Suni Williams have returned to Earth after what turned out to be a grueling 9-month spaceflight.
Not-so-good news: Said a leading expert in spaceflight-associated health changes: “One of the most immediate challenges astronauts face when they return to Earth is mobility and balance. These issues often recover more quickly compared to others, but it takes time for astronauts to readjust to gravity. The balance, mobility, and walking difficulties astronauts experience during the first weeks back are typically resolved in a short period, but brain function and structure require longer recovery periods.”
Useless information supposed to fire my imagination: March 28, 1957, 1st National Curling Championship held (Ya, maybe that ‘dinosaur footprint’ thing too)
Let the UNC/WVU men’s basketball controversary continue as, after winning their play-in game, UNC lost their first round game to Ole Miss.
Men who regularly dodge prostate cancer screening appointments are 45% more likely to die from the disease. Prostate cancer is the most common cancer among men and the second-leading cause of cancer deaths. Just sayin’…
Article I’ll skip: Country singer ‘finds God’ while hunting and fishing in the great outdoors.
Trivia #1 answer: Three of the following MLB teams have never had a league MVP. Which three? – Tampa Bay Devil Rays, San Diego Padres, Florida Marlins, New York Mets, Arizona Diamondbacks, Kansas City Royals – The New York Mets, Arizona Diamondbacks and the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.
Trivia #2 answer: Of the top 9, total strikeouts in a 10-game span, there are only two pitchers on that list. Which two? – Nolan Ryan and Randy Johnson, Nolan Ryan and Steve Carlton, Roger Clemens and Pedro Martinez, Nolan Ryan and Justin Verlander, Bob Feller and Roger Clemens, Nolan Ryan and Pedro Martinez – Nolan Ryan did it twice and struck out 123 batters and 122) and Pedro Martinez did it 7 times – 130 (the most), 128, 123, 122, 121, 120(2x)
Trivia #3 answer: Who has the most Opening Day RBIs (21) in his career? – Adam Dunn, Miguel Cabrera, Vladimir Guerrero, Dave Kingman, Mo Vaughn, Ken Griffey Jr. – Adam Dunn
Trivia #4: Who has the most Opening Day strikeouts in his career (107) – Tom Seaver, Bob Gibson, Randy Johnson, Pedro Martinez, Roger Clemens, Ric Accardi – Randy Johnson
DYK: William H. Taft threw out the first Presidential first pitch from his box seats, not the pitcher’s mound (April 14, 1910).
My tolerance for idiots is extremely low today. I used to have some immunity built up, but obviously there is a new strain out there.
Don’t give up, don’t ever give up.
Be careful out there. (It’s a jungle!)
Happy National Triglycerides Day! (Ya, go ahead and celebrate that!)
“Got my mojo working, but it just won’t work on you
Got my mojo working, but it just won’t work on you
I wanna love you so bad till I don’t know what to do”
– Muddy Waters (Got My Mojo Working) – Newport!
Bonus!
Ed's Head On Friday 